‘Oh, aye, of course I knew he was a Labrador. Of course.’ Niall glanced at his feet, conscious that he was doing this a lot with Carli. It was bloody obvious he’d thought Glen was a person, but they didn’t need to say it out loud. This didn’t need to be audibly articulated. That he’d been jealous of an Australian dog did not have to be said in words.
And as if she could read exactly what he was thinking, because even though they hadn’t seen each other in over a decade some things were hardwired into your understanding of a person, Carli said, ‘We don’t need to speak of this again, do we?’
And all Niall could do was mutter a grateful but sheepish, ‘Aye, thanks, Cass.’
Chapter 14
Niall
Niall came and sat at the foot of the bed, legs stretched out on the rug, Carli, still cross-legged, with a pillow bolstering her lower back.
‘So, this Glen, what’s he got that I don’t?’ He preferred to make a joke out of his own idiocy than pretend it never happened. It was obvious his feelings for Carli had spiked again and he would own them, never having been one to shy away from his ardent affection for any woman, especially her.
Amusement inched its way onto Carli’s lips. ‘Four legs, a tail, always delighted to see me.’
‘You love him?’
‘I do.’
‘Well, lucky Glen. Although I note that he’s not here and I am.’
‘That is true. He doesn’t travel so well. A bit like me.’
Niall quirked his mouth into a smile. This woman. She got him. Understood his humour and his feelings and didn’t judge or push him away. Although that could easily change when he told her the truth about the end of their relationship.That he’d never stopped loving her but had done something he believed would make her fall out of love with him in a flash.
After a long pause, where they were at risk of falling into that staring the face off each other thing they’d done as teenagers, Niall said, ‘I went to the secret garden in the village. Saw your mum’s bench.’
Carli shifted forward a little on the mattress. ‘You did? I haven’t got there myself yet. I wanted to go to the loch first. How is it?’
‘As benches go, it’s in great nick. Nicely varnished, well-polished plaque, no damage. Guess her pals are taking care of it.’
Carli’s shoulders dropped, as if some tension had eased. ‘Oh, I’m pleased. Thank you. It means a lot to me.’
The gratitude in her expression sent a shiver through Niall, a subtle reminder that he didn’t deserve it.
‘Why did you go there?’ Carli asked. Was she onto him? Wondering why the man who didn’t love her anymore visited their secret garden hangout and a memorial to her dead mother. That seemed to be a giant contradiction.
‘I dunno. I was walking and… I kind of drifted there.’
‘Are you okay?’ This was so Carli. Concerned for his welfare when she herself was vulnerable.
‘Aye, I’m fine… By the way’ – Niall rubbed at his face, trying to appear and sound casual, as if he’d hadn’t been thinking of what he was about to say – ‘I found out Mr McInally died. He’s got a bench in there too.’
Carli tensed a little. ‘Oh, does he? Next to Mum’s?’
‘No, thankfully. I’d have to get onto the council if that was the case.’ He paused, considering that he would do that. ‘Can’t believe someone wants to remember the guy, though. I’ve spent half my life trying to forget him.’
Carli smiled warmly. ‘Has it been that hard?’
It was a good question. He rubbed his palm over his knee.
‘What I mean is that he sort of shaped my self-image, even now. When I fuck up, I usually hear him in the back of my mind, telling me I’m like Archie Butler or asking what I’m going to offer the world, apart from being a beach bum.’ He glanced at Carli, nervous of her being unable to contradict this.
The expression she held was, thankfully, soft and unwavering. ‘But you offered the world surfing, so fuck him,’ she said, and some of the tension that had been gripping Niall released its hold.
‘Aye, I guess. He was right about me being shit at maths, though. I can surf but I can’t do the books to save myself.’
‘You weren’t shit at maths. He was shit at teaching you maths, and plenty of people run businesses without doing the books themselves.’
