‘A few cheeky wee snogs?’
‘Aye, maybe a few of those. This is the Kintyre equivalent of a drive-in movie for me. You park up and watch the waterfall.’
‘I don’t understand how it’s not rammed full of people. Where is everyone?’
‘No idea. Folk do come here, but it’s a bit off the beaten track. The Butler family were, and still are, frequent visitors. Maybe other families aren’t as hardy as us.’
‘One day, we could come here,’ she said. ‘With…our kids?’
Sean eyes found hers, and she saw such a vulnerable mix of confusion and hope there that it stalled her heart. ‘Our kids? Cherry?’
Cherry blinked back the fiery bite of tears, and focused on the sunlight twinkling on the water.She had planned to say things today – things about making a go of it with Sean – but not those specific words. They must be her subconscious talking. Like an iceberg cracking apart, things were shifting under the surface, Sean’s kindness and patience affording her the confidence to believe.
‘I know I need to be more positive, Sean. You have no idea how hard this is for me, but you believe in us, and I want to believe, too. You deserve that. We deserve that.’
‘Fuck. That means so much, Cher.’ He took her hand, and she was so glad she’d got to this point. ‘I’ve mostly hidden it,’ he said, ‘but this has been a journey for me too. I have thought about things. I’m not being some naïve idiot who hasn’t considered the way it might go. But, as I said before, no one knows what’s in the future, good or bad. My dad didn’t. My mum didn’t when she married him. It’s all unknown. I might… Fuck, I hate even saying this, because deep down I’m scared it might make you run, but it’s important – what if I get it, too?’
‘What? MND?’ She hadn’t even considered he might be worried about this. It was a real oversight on her part that someone as insightful as Sean wouldn’t be acutely aware of his own mortality after painfully watching his father’s demise.
‘Aye.’
‘Is it hereditary?’
‘Sometimes. In our family, there isn’t any history of it, but that doesn’t stop me wondering. I don’t talk about it, though, ’cause no point worrying yourself stupid over something you can’t control.’
‘I never even thought, Sean. I’m sorry. I’m so wrapped up in myself sometimes. Are there things you can do to minimise the risk?’
‘Aye, I eat healthy-ish, exercise a lot.’
‘You could be healthier. Cut out the Irn-Bru, for one.’ It was a hypothetical, but now she knew she wanted their marriage to work, the thought of losing Sean as her mother had lost her husband became a more frightening possibility.
‘Och, a man’s allowed one vice, right? Which reminds me…’ Sean reached into his bag, retrieved and cracked open a can of the soft drink.
‘Depends how many cans a week that vice is.’
‘Cherry Paradise, are you worried about me?’ He held out the drink to her.
She took it, swigged and handed it back. ‘I am, actually, Sean.’ With her other hand, she brushed over his. Her feelings for him grew so fast, like the emerald moss on the rocks, but she could slip and fall at any time, and that still terrified her.
‘Anyway, this pool... Cold, is it?’
She stood up and glanced down at a silent Sean. He was staring up at her, blinking hard, suggesting surprise at her honesty and worry about her breaking away so soon.
‘It can be,’ he said. Was he talking about something other than the pool? ‘But the strong survive.’
‘Let’s go then.’ Cherry toed off her trainers and slipped out of her t-shirt and shorts. She lowered herself onto the edge of the pool in only her white cotton pants and bra – achoice that would render them very transparent if anyone else appeared.
‘It’s safe to go in, right?’
She saw those green eyes shimmering softly, melding with the cool forest light. And fair play to him – his eyes were on her face, not anywhere else.
‘It’s safe,’ he said. ‘But I’ve no towels, so once you’re wet, you’re wet.’
‘Ah, that’s fine. I’m not afraid of being wet.’ Then, as the double meaning of what she’d said hit her, Cherry was sliding off the rock and down into the bracing cool of the waters below.
Taking the plunge into the unknown and acclimatising to the feeling. Of freezing cold water.
She rose out of the pool, her laughter and breath coming in rapid bursts.
