“Oh, right. Of course.”
Blake tenses slightly, but I'm too tired to really notice or focus on him. My mind is still foggy from lack of sleep, the events of last night replaying in loops that leave me dazed. Perhaps I need to sleep more to clear my head, shake off this haze, but more than that, I do need to talk to someone, vent about the confusion swirling inside me. The desire, the guilt, the fear of blurring lines too far.
Definitely not the real Carolyn. She'll flip if she ever finds out about last night. Even so, it’s not really my fault. If anything, it’s hers. She promised me that Blake has absolutely no interest at all in sex with her, but the truth is, he is like a dog in heat. I’ll call Emma, with her no-nonsense advice and grounding presence. I have to be careful, though. The walls have ears in this place. Every whisper could potentially be overheard by staff. The last thing I need is to derail all Carolyn’s careful plans by having loose lips. I’ll leave the house, get out where I can speak freely without paranoia creeping in.
"Um, I just remembered I have an appointment to meet a friend " I say suddenly, setting down my half-eaten croissant, my voice a little too bright. "Can we do it tomorrow, sweetie? That way Josh can dig out the pond and fill it up with water today, and we can populate it with lovely tadpoles tomorrow."
Freya sulks for a moment, her bottom lip poking out, but she nods and agrees with a dramatic sigh. "Okay. You promise?"
"I promise," I say solemnly, ruffling her curls.
Blake leaves then, excusing himself with a nod, his chair scraping back as he stands. I watch him go, relief mixing with a pang of wistfulness. I don't want him to go. My heart wants him to stay.
Eventually, Freya leaves for school, and I head up to my bedroom. I feel quite light-headed and in a dream world, and Ialmost float up the stairs like a ghost, my robe fluttering around my legs. From the kitchen, I can hear sounds, but other than that there is no one around.
My body relaxes as I meet no one and I’m almost at my door, but then, out of nowhere, Josh, muscular and burly, his work boots tracking dirt on the carpet, grabs my hand out of nowhere, and pulls my startled body toward a shadowed alcove. My heart leaps into my throat, but I can't raise my voice, or I’ll call attention to us, especially with the maids potentially nearby.
“What are you doi- let go!" I hiss furiously.
He doesn’t. Instead, he backs me into my bedroom, kicks the door closed, and tries to kiss me. His lips capture mine. They are rough and demanding. He is pushing towards the bed.
With my hands flat on his chest, I shove with all my might, but he can’t be budged. I am left with no choice but to bite his lip—hard. He yelps, pulling back with a hand to his mouth while I am left with the metallic tang of blood on my tongue. He stares at me with surprise.
“What the fuck?” he mutters.
I'm pissed at him, adrenaline surging hot through me, and I tell him straight, my voice low and fierce, "Are you insane? This is not a relationship. I’m your fucking boss. I don’t care what we did in the past, but you need to behave yourself from now on, or else I’m going to fire your dumb ass.”
He looks so hurt and confused, his brow furrowing, that I actually feel bad for him. I can see he really felt something for Carolyn, and I've shattered something fragile. He looks at me, rubbing his lip and wincing.
To soften the blow, or maybe to get him out faster, I add, "Blake has become suspicious. We should cool it for a few months. Maybe three months."
He nods reluctantly, then mutters a confused apology before slipping out. I breathe a sigh of relief when the door clicks shutbehind him. I really need to speak with Emma, and I can’t wait another day. I am almost desperate by this point. I pull out the secret burner phone from under the mattress, my hands still shaking as I dial her number.
She picks up on the second ring, her voice bright and familiar. "Jules? Hey sweetie, how’s it going?”
“Can you spare a few hours? I really need to talk."
“Of course. When and where?”
“How about a day at the Spa?” I suggest.
She agrees without hesitation, excitement in her tone. “Absolutely, let's do it.”
Chapter Thirty
JULIET
The steam from the shower lingers in the bathroom, clouding the mirror as I stand in front of it wrapped in a plush towel. Droplets of water trace lazy paths down my collarbone. The air is scented with the eucalyptus body wash I'd lathered on, hoping the invigorating aroma would clear my head, but it hasn't. My mind is a tangled mess, replaying last night in a loop of shame and guilt.
I get ready methodically, while I try to figure out how to resolve this overwhelming attraction to Blake. It’s become a throbbing headache behind my eyes. I don’t know why or how, but every time he's near, my body betrays me. Heat radiates out of me, making my skin flush, and my thoughts scatter like leaves in the wind. I can't let it escalate. It's not just the job. And it’s not just Carolyn telling me that she’s doing all this because she wants her family back at the end of my impersonation. It's me—I'm terrified the attachment is growing roots, roots that are going in deeper than I can dig them out again. It’s going to make it too painful to walk away in just over two months without my heart shattering.
I slip into a simple white linen shift dress and pair it with flat espadrilles. I twist my damp hair into a loose bun and secure it with a claw clip. Then I call Franklin and tell him to meet me downstairs. Grabbing my purse, I stuff both my phones inside and head downstairs. The staff move with hushed efficiency in the hallway. The scent of fresh coffee wafts from the kitchen as I slip out to the waiting Bentley.
Franklin nods politely as he opens the door.
Oasis Day is an exclusive, members only spa, tucked away in the Hudson Valley. It has a stone façade, manicured gardens, and the entrance is lined with lavender bushes that release their calming scent as I walk up. Emma is already waiting in the lobby, her wild curls tied back in a ponytail, wearing yoga pants and a tank top. Her face lights up when she sees me. We hug tightly, her arms wrapping around me with that familiar squeeze that helps calm me and tells me everything will be okay.
"It's so good to see you and be able to hug you properly again," she says with a grin. Her green eyes sparkle as she holds me at arm's length and gives me a quick once-over. "You look... different. Glowy, but super stressed. Alright, let's melt all that nasty tension away. Start spilling, what’s going on?”
