“Isee where we stand now.”
“What do you mean by that, Bali?” Maui asked.
“One of the happiest days of my life, and she left because of her personal shit.”
“Well, maybe her leaving was better than her staying. Apparently, being around Red is hard on her.”
“If she wouldn’t have acted an ass in Mississippi, she would have been fine. She didn’t have a problem openly flirting with another nigga in front of him.”
Maui’s eyebrows lifted. I guess she hadn’t heard the latest. I rolled my eyes. I wasn’t about to be the one to inform her. I looked around the room at all my family here to celebrate my engagement and all I could think about was why Noni left. This shit was irritating. I stood from my seat and went looking for Carter. Whenever I was feeling a way, he was always able to soothe me.
When I found him, he was in a corner of the other family room, talking to Red Squared, Asad, Ferris, Mythic, and Epic. As I got closer, he said something to the guys then made his way to me, pulling me in his arms.
“I love you, Bali.”
“I love you, too, Carter. I just needed your touch, baby,” I said softly.
“I know. She’ll be back. I saw Jacob leave out after Red did. I’m pretty sure he was more successful than Red.”
Right after he said so, I heard the door open. I wanted to believe Jacob was back, but I wasn’t sure if Noni would be with him. I was angry, but most of all, I was hurt. Red walked over to us, and said, “Noni’s back, so I’ll leave.”
“No. You’re here to celebrate with your friend, even after that bullshit she pulled this weekend. If you can adjust and be uncomfortable, so can she.”
I walked away from the two of them, then doubled back to kiss Carter. He smiled and patted my ass. He made me so fucking soft. Nothing about that felt put on or forced. I felt like Red and Noni were trying to force their relationship to be on the level that ours was, not realizing just how long Carter had had my heart.All my life.
He’d said that when he proposed. For as long as I can remember, we looked at each other with googly eyes. I loved his dark skin. I was fascinated by it. No one in our family had skin as dark as his. I wanted to believe that Jakari and Uncle WJ were the darkest, and they were still more of a milk chocolate complexion. Carter was as dark as coal when he was in the sun all day. He was so damn gorgeous, especially when he smiled. His teeth were so damn white, and the contrast between them and his skin color only made them look whiter.
When I got to the other sitting room, I saw her. I frowned immediately as I watched Maui try to talk to her. I could tell she wasn’t listening to a thing Maui said, because I looked the same way when she tried to talk to me. I made my way to her and grabbed her hand, pulling her back outside. I turned to her, and asked, “What the fuck? You can’t focus on celebrating our engagement without bringing your bullshit into it?”
She lowered her head. “I’m so happy for you, Bali. It’s just hard, because I thought me and Red would be close to something like this by now. We should be having a double wedding.”
I lifted my eyebrows. “I honestly think that’s an excuse. Not long ago, you accused me of not allowing you to live your life. You were tired of being in my shadow and doing whatever the fuck I was doing. Remember that shit? Come at me straight.”
She glanced up at me, and I could see the tears in her eyes. “I fucked up. I fucked up so bad. I’m not expressive when it comes to my feelings. I keep shit bottled up. Seeing your happiness had my emotions showing out. I know that I’m not ready for the type of relationship you and Carter have, and I know that’s mainly what Red wants. I don’t know how to be soft around him without that shit taking a toll on me. That’s why he always wants my attention. He rarely gets it.”
I took a deep breath and pulled her into my arms. This girl was fucked up. She rested her head against mine. “You need to talk to Karima or Aunt Tiff.”
“What if I wanna talk to you? You’re more like me than anybody else. How were you able to achieve this level of softness with Carter?”
“I don’t think I’m the woman for the job, because I might knock yo’ ass out if you come at me wrong again. I done restrained myself way too many times the past three months.”
“The difference back then was that I wasn’t receptive. I’m receptive now, Bali. I have to work on myself. My guard is always up, even around Red. What if he isn’t the man for me?”
“I think he is. The timing was just wrong. Get ready to work, because I’m ’bout to have you in class taking notes and writing journal entries.”
She rolled her eyes, then hugged me tightly again. “Your first item of business is going in there and apologizing to Red foralmost fucking up his weekend. Mister Red had to put some extra umph on them prayers.”
She giggled and wiped the tears from her face. I kissed her cheek, and said, “Come on. Let’s go eat. You had my stomach fucked up, and now I’m starving.”
“I had my own stomach in knots. That bitch growling now.”
I slowly shook my head as we walked back inside. I didn’t know how I would help my sister through this, because I was impatient as a muthafucka, but I would do my best. Her being here for this moment in my life meant everything to me. I loved the hell out of Carter, but the moment would have been bittersweet without Noni.
Once we were back inside, Maui came to us and hugged us both like she used to do when she was little. I chuckled and shook my head. “Girl, if you don’t move,” I said.
She chuckled and released us. “Now, let’s turn up!”
“Girl, naw. Not until we eat,” Noni said.
