She trails off, the blush deepening.
“Kind of what?”
“Kind of hot, if I’m being honest.” She says this like an admission that annoys her. “Real arrogant energy, too. Like he knew exactly how good he looked and expected everyone else to notice. If he wasn’t kind of an asshole about the whole following-me-around thing, I might’ve been flattered by the attention.”
Yep, that’s him alright.
“Why?” she asks. “What’s it to you?”
“That’s Nico D’Ambrosio,” I say flatly.
“D’Ambrosio…” Lydia says the name like she’s tasting it. “Hang on, like the same D’Ambrosios that Luca ended up working for?”
“The exact same,” I answer. “What did he want with you?”
“Nothing.” She shrugs. “Just followed and stared.”
“He’s dangerous.”
“I know how to take care of myself, Bella.” Her voice is steady. “Been doing it ever since I walked out of my mama’s house and into yours when I was seventeen. Nico D’Ambrosio doesn’t scare me.”
He should.
“But enough about me.” She reaches over and squeezes my hand. “What the hell happened to you?”
There’s no sense not telling her, I think. And besides, I don’t have to tell her the whole truth. Just the parts that matter.
Slowly, I begin to talk, telling her about the party on Don Leo’s yacht without mentioning what that man almost did to me. I tell her about the trip back to Slava’s penthouse, about what was in the closet, and about what Luca really did without ever mentioning Alessandro.
“Jesus…” Lydia breathes when I’m done. “You mean this whole time?—”
“Luca was never the brother I thought I knew.”
Lydia shifts on the couch as silence settles for a moment. Then, she takes my hands in hers and asks gently. “Did you sleep with Slava in France?”
“Yes.” The word comes out smaller than I mean it to.
“More than once?”
“Yes.”
“And it was…”
“Incredible.” I close my eyes. “It was the most incredible sex of my entire life, which is really not the point and also somehow makes everything worse.”
Lydia is quiet for a long moment. Then: “Oh Bella… No.”
“What?”
“You’re in love with him.”
“I’m not.” I deny automatically the same way I’ve been trying to deny it. But just hearing her say it, my heart starts racing.
This whole time, people have asked me if Slava loved me, and I don’t have an answer. But no one has ever asked me if I was in love with him.
And truth be told, I think I know the answer.
Maybe I’ve always loved him. Maybe it happened when I dove so deep into my obsession about avenging Luca that I came out the other side in love.
