Our lips are so damn close, but a million miles away, like the galaxies I used to dream about in the night sky.
He turns his head to the side, avoiding a confrontation with our mouths. The cross necklace that dangles from his tense throat dances over my lips, threatening to drop down into my throat and suffocate me.
I dig my fingers through his hair as I break, shooting my fourth load of the night onto both of our stomachs. And then he follows suit, burying himself within me one last time. The muscles in his ass contract over and over again as he spends himself, painting my insides in hot, sticky cum. He collapses onto me, the weight of his body pushing my back against the uneven coils. The necklace, as predicted, slips into my mouth. It drags over my tongue and then slips back out as he rolls over onto his back.
And I do the unthinkable.
I roll over onto my side, cradle my head over his arm and place a hand over his heaving chest.
And then he does the unthinkable, too.
Hedoesn’t push me away.
The serene view of a lake beneath a perfect summer sky with the moon bright and high brings about a sense of calm I’m not accustomed to. Parked out here in a small hollow between the endless pines, the world has never felt so far away.
I suck the last remnants of my soda through the plastic straw and toss the empty cup into a greasy fast-food bag. Noah twists the cap back on a bottle of water and watches me as I lean back on my elbows, kicking my feet off the front of the hood.
Something about the beautiful night sky makes me want to confess and reflect on the things that keep me up at night. “I have daddy issues.”
“No shit.” He nudges me with an elbow. “For what it’s worth, I have Mommy issues.”
“Maybe I have those, too?” I contemplate whether that’s an accurate assessment or not. “She wasn’t the worst Mom in the world, but she’s dead now. I guess that could inspire some mommy issues but Dad was never really there.”
“Mine was the worst mom in the whole world, and she’s also dead now.” He averts his gaze and stares out at the lake. “My only regret is that I didn’t tell her how much I truly hated her as she decomposed in that hospital bed. She really deserved to depart this world knowing how fucking awful she was, and yet I told her I loved her on her way out. I wasn’t there the day shepassed because I was blackout drunk with another guy.”
A casual confession of infidelity wasn’t on my bingo card, but I can’t pretend to be too surprised. From what little I know, this Kevin dude isn’t some knight in shining armor. It’s the other confession that hits like a brick wall, though.
I’m learning to curb my penchant for prying, so I avoid asking clarifying questions. “People do terrible things, but we’re not responsible for the things they do.”
“Those are the wisest words that have ever escaped your pretty little lips.”
A scream rips into the sky, exploding into a red and white flower. It shatters the illusion of serenity as more follow behind, whistling toward the heavens above.
Noah looks at me underneath the galaxy of exploding fireworks—pinks, blues, and greens—spider-webbing across the night sky. And I meanreallylooks at me, as if he’s about to say something truly poetic.
I swallow nervously as I await a declaration of love or a concrete proposal to be more than two guys who fuck each other’s brains out. He brushes a soft hand over my cheek, sending a chill down my side.
“You can call me Daddy, if you want.”
My face must contort between disappointment and a forced smile a hundred times before I’m able to say anything at all. “Daddy?”
“Yeah?” He lifts me by my chin. “What do you want, Punk?”
“Can I suck your dick?”
He pauses, like there’s a chance in fucking hell he’d ever say no. Still, the suspense is enough to make my heart patter. “Give Daddy a kiss first.”
He draws his knee to his chest as he reaches for me. Pulls me in by the scruff of my shirt. A gentle hand on my cheek. A gentler peck on my lips. And then a soft hunger as he parts my lips with his tongue, all the while undoing his belt buckle with his free hand.
The parade of fireworks deafen me, but lights up the sharp contours of his face. I wish I could keep him like this forever. Wish that I could, at the very least, capture this memory in a photo.
A thin drizzle of spit hangs from my lips as I back away from him and jump off the hood of the car. I grab him by his ankles and pull him to the edge, and by the time he’s reached it, he already has his jeans pushed to his thighs.
I grab his cock with one hand and lick a trail from the base of the shaft to the thick head. Lick my tongue around the top like a lollipop. Bring my hand to the tip, circle my palm around it and brush a finger over the leaking slit. His fingers play with the hair swept over my face. His chest shudders as I take his entire length in my mouth.
Noah shows love through moans ofpleasure. The long-lost seventh love-language of getting your dick sucked. And sucking his cock is how I show it back.
We’re torn from the same bloody cloth. Our souls ripped, busted, and bruised. What we once found in strangers, we now find in each other. Sex has always been transactional like a never-ending game of I give and they take. But there’s something about sucking the same cock over and over again. Something about the way he shows his appreciation when he’s spent himself. Something about the way my mouth twists around his dick and yet all I can think about is kissing him again.
