“But…it’s an advantage, right?”
“Okay, guys.”
Rachel’s chin jerked up because Connor had spoken. He was still standing, his hands raised defensively as if there were weapons, not just eyes, aimed at him. “Yes, we had sex. Yes,maybe we shouldn’t have used Maddie’s desk. Yes, we argued. Things just…” His gaze slid to her. “…escalated.”
“Had sex or do?” Maddie asked in a high-pitched voice.
Connor raised his eyebrows. “What?”
“Did you have sex just that one time, or are you still doing it?”
Rachel swallowed and wrung her hands. “We’re still doing it,” she murmured. “But only…a little.”
“That didn’t look like a little,” Tara remarked cheerfully.
No. It didn’t. It wasn’t.
“It's no big deal, okay?” Connor replied roughly. “It’s only sex!”
Only sex.
The words pierced her heart like two large needles. She’d never realized before how powerful the little wordonlywas.
Connor certainly didn’t mean it that way. He only said it because of the others. Right? It wasn’t just…onlysex... was it?
I’ll never get married. You know that.
“What’s this crap?” Lucy interrupted her thoughts, glaring at her. “You have time to screw the divorce lawyer next door, Maddie’s declared archenemy, but not to visit Dad?!” Her face turned so red it rivaled her hair. “Dad said he’s called you five times and you haven’t even gotten back to him! What the hell?”
Rachel’s mouth went dry, and when she opened it, wanting to say something – she didn’t know what to say. There was only the burning in her throat, the guilt in her diaphragm, and the gaping emptiness in her head.
“Are you arguing with Dad?” Lucy continued heatedly. “Because he’s starting to think that. But what could the poor guy have done? He’s sick and needs help, Rachel! And you’re a damn psychologist. What kind of heartless person are you if you can’t even call your own fa…“
“That’s enough,” Connor said, cutting Lucy off, looking no less angry now. “Back the hell off.’
“Why the hell do you think you have the right to interfere?” Lucy exclaimed.
“Connor, be quiet,” Rachel muttered, shaking her head helplessly.
“No.” Now he glared at her. “She’s going too far! You don’t call your sister heartless. You should ask her how she’s doing when she’s acting strangely.”
“I should ask her how she’s doing?” Lucy cried out. “After she abandoned us?”
“Lucy,” Maddie pleaded softly.
“No!” She pressed her lips together and shook her head. “I have the right to be angry!”
“You do!” Rachel replied weakly. Her eyes burned uncontrollably. “But I didn’t fill my time with Connor so I could avoid Dad. This thing with him has nothing to do with any of this. It’s something else entirely, Lucy.”
“Yes! You don’t owe him anything.” She pointed a trembling finger at Connor. “But you owe us – me, Maddie, Dad –everything. Thank you, Rachel, for proving once again where your priorities lie.” She turned on her heels and stormed out of the garden.
Beside her, Maddie took a deep breath. “I’m…going after her,” she said quietly, but couldn’t look Rachel in the eyes…and Rachel’s heart broke.
Even Maddie believed that Lucy was a bit right. Shit, evenshebelieved it.
But how was she supposed to explain to her sisters that she had nothing but bad memories of their mother to offer their father, who spent his days keeping her memory alive? She had nothing but betrayal, deceit, and lies to add.
Silence hung over the garden. But it was okay; she had no business being here any longer. She had to tell Lucy and Maddie the truth.
