“Good question. But instead of just being honest or explaining whatever it was that caused this shift, he put the blame on me. Said I worked too much. So I tried to take off more time, going out, having fun together to show him I could be what he needed.”
“I don’t like where this is going at all,” Vicky said.
“No, you won’t. I tried to be my extroverted self, the one he’d loved when we first met. Then suddenly I was too loud, too extreme, too much. That’s all he kept saying. I was too much, but also not enough.” The tears trickled down my cheeks, and in an instant, the girls surrounded me with hugs so tight it felt like they were putting me back together again.
“If I ever see him, he’ll find out what too much looks like,” Luke barked. “Leyla, you do realize this had nothing to do with you. This was a cowardly man who made you feel like you were the problem. Tell me you understand that.”
After the girls pulled away, they settled on either side of me, still holding my hands. I took a deep breath to answer. “I’m getting there, bestie. I’m starting to see things the way they really are.”
“Leyla, we wish you’d told us this two years ago. We could’ve walked through this with you,” Sofia said, concern coloring her face.
“I was foolish not to share this with you guys. I was just so embarrassed. He made me feel small and ridiculous, as if myoutgoing personality were something to be ashamed of. When I look back over our relationship, I realize I was always the one trying, always the one changing to suit him,” I said through tears.
“You have nothing to be sorry about,” Vicky said quietly. “When a man can fully see you, just as you are, and not only appreciate it but also encourage it, that’s when you’ve found someone special.” Her eyes were watery as she spoke, and Miles winked at her.
“Thank you, all of you. I’ll never keep something this big from you again. Promise. I understood in my head that I shouldn’t have to change for a man, but my heart longed to be loved.”
“You are loved. Fully and completely. By God, and by us,” Vicky said.
“That’s right, Aunt Leyla. A man should love you for who you are. That’s what Jojo says, anyway,” MJ said, her words making us all turn toward where she stood. I hadn’t even heard her come outside.
Miles growled and mumbled something I didn’t catch, then stood, kissed his daughter on the head, and guided her inside.
We all snickered while Vicky sighed loudly, mumbling again in Italian.
“She’s right, though. Niko said the same thing the other day at lunch,” I said. As soon as the words left my mouth, I regretted them. My three friends all turned toward me, their faces registering varying degrees of shock, even Vicky, who had just heard part of the story.
“Oh,really?” Sofia cooed.
I needed to start regulating my verbal filters.
“It was sweet. He shared something, so I did too. That’s what friends do, right?”
They all nodded as I looked from one to another, expectantly. I needed immediate backup to know it was okay to be his friend.
“What else did you and yourfriendNiko talk about at lunch?” Luke asked with a smirk.
The three of them were watching me like wolves in a chicken coop. I swallowed and decided I might as well come clean. Between Sofia’s detective work and Luke’s gossiping, they were bound to find out. I was sure Jaz was in on this as well, since she acted weird every time she, Niko, and I were in the break room together.
“I, um, I may have offered to help him. You know,friendstuff. Stuff a friend would do,” I mumbled nervously.
When Sofia smiled widely, her teeth showed, and I backed up, the image of the big, bad wolf filling my mind.
Clearing my throat, I reached for my drink, only to put it down when I found it empty. My shaking hand almost knocked it over.
“Talk to us. We won’t bite,” Vicky said, creeping me out even more.
Regaining some semblance of control, I answered, “I’ll be helping, ah, assisting him on a project.”
“A project at work?” Luke asked, leaning toward me. “Which one and why don’t I know about it?”
I shook my head. “No, not at work.”
“So, something not work-related.” Sofia tilted her head and tapped her lips, her eyes lifted in thought. “Let’s see. What could it possibly be?”
“None of your business. This is on a need-to-know basis, and you don’t need to know,” I said, knowing I sounded like a seven-year-old.
“Nope, not letting it go now that you’re blushing. It’swaymore personal than that,” Sofia said.
