“Two years. I was so angry and hurt that I haven’t gone on a single date since. A self-declared man ban,” she said with a chuckle.
As I led us back to my car, my brain snagged on that word.
Man ban. No dating. My stomach plummeted to my feet. This was going to be harder than I had thought.
Once she was settled in the car a few minutes later, I pushed my luck and asked, “So you really haven’t dated anyone in two years?”
“Nope,” she said pointedly as I closed her door and walked to the driver’s side.
As I slid in and started the car, she said, “Not going to anytime soon, either. I think I’m done.”
When I put my arm behind her seat and turned to look behind me while backing up, I heard her take a deep breath. Once safely on the road, I asked, “Everything okay?”
She nodded, but wouldn’t look at me. “Yup. All good. I’m just fine. Good. Super good.” She cleared her throat a minute later and asked. “You don’t use your backup camera?”
I wasn’t sure why that mattered, but I answered, “No, I don’t trust it, I guess.” She nodded but continued facing forward.
Leading us back to our previous conversation, I said, “But what if someone really great came along? You wouldn’t be interested in dating him?” I asked, sneaking glances at her.
“Doubt it.” She turned in her seat to face me, making me nervous. “What about you?”
I swerved to avoid a curb but regained control quickly. “Sorry, I thought I saw a pothole.” It was only partially true. I started sweating, thinking about her question.
“No worries. So areyou, um, dating someone? You haven’t mentioned anyone. I mean, not that you would to me, I guess. But we’re friends now, so…” She wiped her forehead and turned back to face the windshield.
Taken aback by the question I wasn’t expecting, I stammered an answer. “Nope. Not seeing anyone right now. I haven’t for a while, come to think of it. I guess we have that in common.”
“Oh, really? Why not?”
I blame what happened next on the emotional nature of our previous conversation in the café, the revelation that she wasn’t interested in dating, and was now asking about my dating life. Did I mention that I was also driving?
“W-women make me nervous. I don’t do well on dates,” I said, with a strangled-sounding chuckle.
“Nervous? You don’t need to be nervous. Is it all women or just some? Have you always felt this way?”
She was peppering me with questions, and my brain was sputtering. If I could picture the inside of it, I’d surely see little men in overalls trying to get my synapses to work properly, but I was too far gone. Why overalls? I blame it on Mike and his wild imagination and the ridiculous conversations we’d had in the past.
“Ah, yes?”
She laughed and tapped my arm, causing more synapses to fire in the wrong places. How far was the office? I felt like I’d been driving for hours. I could feel my mouth drying up, and my armpits were a swamp.
“Hey, you know what would be a great idea?” she asked with enthusiasm. Praying she was moving on to another subject, I shook my head.
“No.” My tongue was numb. Completely numb. I was starting to become alarmed at this point.
“Icould help you out,” she announced, like she was about to gift me with a grand prize.
“H-help me out?”
Oh, look. It’s the office, finally.
I pushed the gas pedal to get there as fast as possible so I could get out of this car and end this conversation.
“Yeah, like give you pointers. Give you topics a woman would be interested in,” she said, her eyes wide with what looked like excitement.
I pulled into the first open spot I found and parked, feeling like I was about to faint. Sweat was pouring off me. Did Mike set this up? My brain was scanning all the data, trying to figure out how he would have managed such a thing, but I came up empty.
“So, what do you think?” Her green eyes were wide, her cheeks flushed pink, and she turned back to look at me. I was a goner.
