“Falling in and out of love isn’t everything it’s cracked up to be. It probably saved you from wasting time on the wrong people. Don’t feel bad. I get how overwhelming these powerful feelings can be. I’d be overwhelmed too. I’ve never experienced anything like what you’re describing, just awkward dates and boring dinners with a few good ones now and then. Just take your time.”
“What if I don’thavetime, though? My visa is only for three months.” I groaned again, turning on my side and bringing my phone with me as it stayed on speaker. “I’m crazy to even think there’s a possibility with Enzo and Anna around. Not sure why I’m even stressing about it. Oh wait. What happened to your guy with the cute accent?”
“It didn’t work out. Don’t worry about me. Look, Enzo will have to deal with it if something more happens, and Miles won’t always be a client. After this design job is over, you’ll be free to pursue something with him,” she said, her words letting hope bloom in my chest.
“That’s if he even wants anything like that. I still may be reading the room wrong.”
“Doesn’t sound like you’re reading anything wrong to me.” She waited a beat, then asked, “What’s really going on? Why the doubt after all you’ve told me?”
“I just can’t understand what he’d see in me.” I cut her off when Iheard her start to speak. “I know, I know. Don’t talk about your best friend like that.”
“Got that right,” she snarled.
“It’s just. Yes, okay, yes, I know I struggle with my body image, but it’s more than that. I’m a college graduate, arecentone. He’s an older CEO single dad, girl. I mean, seriously. What could he possibly see in me? He said his ex, Katy, left when MJ was about two, so he’s been alone for close to seven years. Maybe he’s just lonely, and I’m easy to talk to.”
Ren was probably getting dressed, I realized, when I heard a zipper close and heels on her tile floor. “I’m choosing to ignore your poor assessment of yourself for now, amica, because you’ve never seen what I see in you. But I will tentatively agree with you that he might just be looking for a friend.But,” she answered, emphasizing her last word, “friends don’t gape at each other and practically pull them down helping with a bag, or hold your hand and rub your palm while sharing their thoughts. Or gaze into your eyes, sparks flying all over the room. The age difference, the life experience differences, none of that is news to you. Whatisnew, though, is how he’s been acting now that you’re getting to spend time alone together.”
I regretted sharing all those details because I knew she’d use them against me, but with no experience with the opposite sex, I was desperate for her interpretation. And she was correct. Everything she said had happened. I may not know everything, but I knewthat.
Miles Austin was attracted to me. There was no denying it, but I had no idea why and more importantly, what could come of it. Ren’s last words had, however, brought me some comfort.
“Gotta head out now, but let me just say this. Be open to what could come from this, Vicky. You have so much to give to anyone lucky enough to want more than friendship from you. I know you’re not ready for a serious relationship like marriage yet, but Miles could be the one. And if he is, he will wait for you to be ready. If not, he was never worth your time. Right now, pursue friendship. Pursue your career. Go after the things you want right now for your life. Everything else will fall into place. God will guide you every step of the way.”
“Thanks, amica. You’re the best. Go. Get to work. We’ll talk again soon. Love you.”
“Love you more. And remember. You’re beautiful, inside and out.”
As I lay in the dark hours later, reflecting on Ren’s words, mainly her last ones, I prayed for guidance and help. Mostly, I prayed that my heart wouldn’t end up broken into a thousand pieces.
The next few days at work went by quickly. Anna told me they received a call from someone in Miles’ office. Apparently, one of his employees bought a small house in a neighborhood about twenty minutes from their office, and he had recommended me. After meeting with the young couple, there was an excitement to help them achieve their plans.
Knowing how busy both Miles and I were, I held off on thanking him until I saw him at the party on Saturday. The day after I met with the new clients, Elena called me, expressing how pleased she was with what I had accomplished so far in Miles’ house, as I sent her photos and sketches of the completed work. Gratefully, Anna seemed to have looked past whatever caused her stern reminder of the office rules, telling me more than once what a great job I was doing.
I was still riding that high as I walked around the Little Italy Farmer’s Market that Saturday morning. I wanted to find the perfect housewarming gift for Miles and MJ; something personal from me.
My phone pinged multiple times. When I slipped it out of my back pocket, a wicked grin crossed my face.
Enzo:ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW?
Enzo:I know this was you!
Enzo:I can’t believe you did this!
Me: Why r u yelling
Enzo:Vicky, I know this was you. You still have the gym’s IG log-in info from the charity gala ads, don’t you?
Me:Yeah, what about it?
I snickered thinking about him pacing and pulling his hair.
Enzo:Vicky! Everyone in the gym is hugging me. Hugging me! Are you crazy? An old woman pinched my butt this morning!
Stepping away from the crowd onto the sidewalk behind the tents, I closed out the text app and went to his gym Inspire Fitness’ IG account.
My post that read “Our fearless leader Enzo might look tough…but every fighter needs a hug sometimes! The hashtags #toughguysneedhugstoo #gentlegiant #trainerfeels, were the perfect revenge. I laughed so hard, I couldn’t breathe.
Me:Ren, mission accomplished
