He turns to me. “Rumor, I know this is a difficult time for you, but things will eventually get better. As reluctant as you are to try counseling, I think it might actually help.”
“Talking about my dead mom?” I huff. “I guarantee that’ll only make things worse.”
“You don’t have to talk about your mother. You can talk about anything. Missing New York. School. Your cousins. Whatever’s on your mind.”
Actually, I could use someone to talk to about that stuff. I can talk to Jackson, and I do, but we never have enough time. And I can’t talk to him about Axl. It feels wrong to do that, and yet I feel like I need to talk about what happened. I still haven’t accepted that Axl cheated on me, or that he never loved me.
“What if they won’t let me?” I ask.
“Won’t let youwhat?” Brock says.
“Switch counselors. You heard Principal Edwards. He said it had to be the school counselor.”
“If she’s not helping you, or if you’re not comfortable with her, he’ll have no choice but to allow you to see someone else. This was his idea, after all. There’s no point in doing it if the counselor is ineffective.”
“How do I convince him she’s not working?”
“Keep quiet during the sessions. Don’t answer her questions. Or if you do, keep your answers vague or outlandish. Either of those will clue her in that you’re lying. If she can’t get you to open up to her with the truth, it’s no use continuing the sessions.”
Another acting job. I feel like that’s all I do around here. Pretend. Be someone I’m not. Lie. Just like what I’m doing for Jackson to get info on the football team. Playing people to get something in return. It feels wrong, and I’m tired of it, but apparently it’s the only way to survive around here.
Chapter 2
“You want me to act,” I say. “Pretend she’s not helping.”
“You won’t be acting. Ms. Adams is incapable of helping you. She’s too inexperienced. I just need you to communicate that to Principal Edwards, after a couple sessions, of course, so it looks like you tried.”
“And what if I don’t like the next counselor? Can I quit?”
“We’ll see. I want you to at least give it a chance. What Principal Edwards said is true. You’ve been through a lot the past few weeks. The loss of your mother alone is enough reason for you to talk to someone.” He reaches over and pats my hand. “Just try it. At least give it a chance.”
I nod and try the door handle again. Brock clicks the lock open, and I hurry to get out.
As we’re walking into the house, Brock says, “We’ll leave at seven.”
I turn back. “The game starts at seven. We’ll miss most of the first quarter if we leave that late.”
He smiles. “I didn’t know you were so interested in Braden’s game.” He checks his watch. “It’s almost six. I suppose we could leave at six thirty.”
“What about dinner? Can we go out?”
He eyes me like this is some kind of trick. I never want to be around him, and now I’m suggesting we go to dinner? I think this acting thing is starting to come naturally to me now. Act to get what you want, and right now, I don’t want to be punished for hitting Kristen. The school punishment is bad enough. I don’t want another one from Brock. If I get on his good side, maybe he won’t punish me.
“Where would you like to go?” Brock asks.
“The taco place?” I say with a smile.
“What taco place?”
“The one that looks like a metal shack. It’s not much from the outside but the food is good.”
“You’ve been there?”
“I went with some people from school,” I lie, knowing he’d yell at me if he knew I’d gone with Jackson and Shayla, the two people he doesn’t want me around.
“I’m not sure why I’m going along with this after what happened today,” he says, rubbing his jaw, “but yes, we can go.”
“Great! I’ll go change and meet you back here in ten.”
