"So I'm an asshole. Like I didn't already know that?"
"You only act that way when people are getting too close. Remember how much we fought when we first became friends? I almost gave up and decided it wasn't worth it."
"Why didn't you?"
"Because I figured out it wasn't about me. It was you. You couldn't handle someone knowing you like I did. It freaked you out. You keep people at a distance. It's easier that way."
"And yet your stubborn ass kept showing up."
"Like Brook. She keeps trying to be nice to you even though you keep telling her to get lost. This girl really likes you. Either that, or she likes annoying the shit out of you."
"She doesn't annoy me. I like having her around. I like doing stuff with her. I can talk to her."
"But you let her leave." He gets up. "When are you going to stop this, Dean?"
"Stop what?"
"Stop letting your dad ruin your life."
I shoot up from the chair. "My dad? What the fuck are you talking about?"
"The reason why you won't date, or have a girlfriend."
"I never should've told you that. I knew you'd use it against me."
"That's not what I'm doing. But I'm not going to just watch as you let a girl you really like go away because of something that isn't true."
I get up in his face. "How do you know it's not true? You've seen my dad. We look exactly alike. I got every one of his fucked-up genes. I look like him. I act like him. And I get angry like him. You seriously think I'd put someone at risk, someone I love, knowing what I'm capable of?"
"So you DO love her."
I sigh. "That's not what I meant."
"You love Jake. And you've never hurt him."
"No, but I've come close. I got the hell out of here before it happened."
"I could lock you in a room with him after he did something to really piss you off and I guarantee you wouldn't hurt him."
"You don't know that," I say, walking away. "I'm done talking about this. You should go."
"Typical Dean. Try to be a friend and he tells you to go to hell." He walks to the door. "You want to be alone your whole life? Keep this up. You might just get what you asked for."
He goes out the door, slamming it shut. I almost go out there and apologize but I can't make myself do it.
Why am I like this? Why do I always push away the people I care about?
Brook's been gone less than an hour but damn, I miss her. She told me to think about what I want, but I already know. I want Brook. I'm not ready to commit to having a girlfriend, but maybe I could be if I gave it more time. I need to somehow convince myself I'm not like my father. That I could be with a woman without hurting her.
The door swings open and Jake walks in.
"How was the movie?"
He shrugs. "It was okay." He walks to the fridge. "We got anything to eat?"
"The leftover spaghetti's in there."
He looks around. "Where's Brook? I thought she was having dinner with us."
