“Is Erik the only one looking for me?” I licked my lips, trying my hardest not to shut down in fear at the mere mention of his name. “Erik and Yusef?”
“Theyarelooking,” he confirmed.
I appreciated that he didn’t try to lie.
“But we are one step ahead of them. No one is going to get past the Dubinin defenses.”
“Are they the only ones looking for me, though? What about the Riveras? What about any of the men I was supposed to have been sold to?” I hated to be so dependent when I was desperate to be free and independent. But I didn’t hesitate to rest my hands on his chest as he hugged me.
“There is some noise about them too. But Simon—he’s our top cyber expert—he’s watching it all. We have men on this. I’ve headed many operations like this, and I promise you, we are on top of it.”
My worry lingered. In the back of my mind, I had stubbornly known all along that this would be temporary here. Like a fantasy. Not a happily-ever-after. I wasn’t sure I could ever be happy, or safe, forever so long as my brother and his friend lived in this same world.
“Please try to trust me.” He took my hand and kissed it.
I nodded, furrowing my brow and realizing I already was. I did. I trusted Alexsei with my body. I trusted him to make me feel good. But he couldn’t reallyknowthat I would be safe from my past for good.
Can he?
I shelved the thoughts. Seeing Misha looking around for me and Alexsei pulled me back into the moment. We both headed out and walked around on a path, admiring the snow. Yet, no matter what I tried to do and how often I paused to correct the track of my thoughts, I was still anxious.
That night, Alexsei came to my room. He stood at the closed door and watched me.
“Is it possible?” I asked, sitting on the edge of my bed. “Is it possible that they could find me?”
“If it becomes more probable, they won’t get you,” he said, coming to sit next to me.
I stared at him as he brushed my hair back behind my ear so he could see me clearer.
“They’d have to kill me to get to you.”
I inhaled a deep breath. Not because the idea of killing my brother or Yusef startled me, but because it sounded too good to be true.
“I’ve…” I frowned, lowering my gaze. Shame lit through me, and I wanted to hide it from him, but he tipped my chin up, prompting me to face him. “I’ve wished for that so many times.”
“That he was dead?”
I nodded, emboldened when not a hint of judgment showed on his face. “Both of them. For all they did to me. When they first took over my life, when the shock was still new, I vowed that I would. That one day, I would get free and kill them both.”
He took my hands and caressed the tops of my knuckles.
“I tried to escape once and barely lived through the beating, but over the years, I lost hope that I’d ever get free to make that come true.”
He leaned in and kissed me softly. “But you are free now.”
Am I? Then why don’t Ifeelfree?
“And I will kill them if they try to retrieve you.”
I rested my hand against his face, letting my brow roll against his. “Why?”
That was the other part of the riddle I didn’t understand. “Why do you care?”
He kissed me, and I felt the slight smile on his lips.
“Why would you do that for me?” I asked as he urged me to straddle him.
“Because it’s who I am.”
