He frowned.
“I need this for closure. Killing my tormentors and paying them back for all they’ve done…”
“I’m not telling you no, Kalina. I haven’t and never will try totellyou what to do. I’ve been very careful not to. This is the one exception.”
I shook my head, determined not to be sidelined.
“I refuse to risk your safety.”
Clamping my lips together, I exhaled through my nose.
“It’s not only you that I need to protect, but also our child. This baby.” He stepped back toward me and rested his hand on my stomach with that gentle and possessive touch he had reserved for me.
I lowered my gaze and sighed. I understood where he was coming from, but this was literally a once-in-a-lifetime chance.
“You are pregnant, and while you are healthy and fit and have shown that you are a quick learner in the range, I can’t bear to risk your being near danger.”
I nodded, but it wasn't an agreement. I understood his point. I really did. When I mentioned to Sadie how much I wished I could kill my brother and his friend, she warned me against making the mistake of not trusting Alexsei to do that for me, togive him that chance to be my hero. She had been insistent on going with Emil on a mission that she’d started as an FBI agent. She’d wanted to go along on the mission for closure to her last official case, but she was further along in her pregnancy then. In fact, she’d gone into labor the day of the mission, when Emil was hours away.
I cringed, imagining how selfish and greedy he might think I sounded.
“I know,” I repeated. “And I hate for you to ever think that I would risk this new life and be careless while I’m carrying him or her.”
He kissed my brow.
“But when I imagine having the chance to take a step and participate in fighting back against all that I suffered, it’s with you there. Having my back. Protecting me. All while I do the dirty work of pulling the trigger.”
He sighed, watching me with those patient blue eyes.
“If it matters that much to you…”
I blinked in surprise.
“I might be able to compromise,” he admitted seriously.
“You can?” I started to smile, my excitement reignited with the dangerous thrill of getting closure and revenge.
“I could allow you to be there. Nearby and watching. But please, Kalina. I can’t bear the thought of losing you or your being harmed. I beg you to trust me to handle thisforyou. For our future.”
Our future.
I was supposed to be looking forward, not back at the past I wanted to escape from.
Yet, with his compromise and gentle, guiding love, I knew that this one last goal of mine, this secret dream, would be the final nail to hammer into place so I could leave my sordid past behind me.
33
ALEXSEI
Compromise.
That was the crucial ingredient to what we needed here.
In any relationship, the ability to work with a little give-and-take was something that could have two people last or fade. Love was one factor in it. But this need to meet in the middle was important.
And it was vital for how Kalina and I could try to get past this last and biggest hurdle in the way of our future. She couldn’t be safe with the Riveras not paying for what they’d done and with their expecting they could take her from me. She wouldn’t be at peace with Erik and Yusef at large and posing a threat.
Wehadto kill them.
