It had been one hell of a day. Driving to Chicago, getting medicine and soup for Riot. Having sex with Cash. I was starting to live the rock and roll lifestyle, and I waslovingit.
But somehow, being asked out by Milo made me more nervous than anything up to that point.
After helping the poor hotel janitor clean up my soup mess, I returned to my room and thought about that. Why did I feel so nervous about the date with Milo? I’d been on plenty of dates in my life. The Denver show was still a week away.
I supposed it was because of howformala date felt. Milo had taken the time to put on a polo shirt to ask me out. Our date was in the future. I had lots of time to think and over-think about it. That was in stark contrast to how spontaneously I’d hooked up with Riot and now Cash.
It was all so crazy. I’d never thought of myself as the kind of woman who would get involved with more than one guy in parallel. We used to call those girlsslutsin high school.
But I didn’t feel guilty about what I was doing. I was pleasantly surprised by my lack of shame. Riot’s comment had resonated with me:rock and roll. We’re supposed to have fun.”
I took a shower, savoring the large bathroom and the bottomless supply of hot water. Compared to quick showers on the tour bus, this felt so wonderfullyluxurious. Then I slipped into the hotel robe that was hanging in the closet and relaxed on the bed. I turned on the TV, but I wasn’t paying attention to what was playing.
Growing up, I’d never been a wild or crazy girl. Not even in college when I had the freedom to do whatever I wanted. Sure, I went to parties back then. Yeah, sometimes I brought a guy home with me. But it was rare. I could count on one hand how many men I’d slept with in my life before this tour.
I’d always kind of regretted not having more fun back then. College was when you weresupposedto experiment and try new things. Nobody would judge you for it because it was college. Now, being on tour with Cherry Midnight, it felt like I was getting a second chance!
Despite that, I couldn’t help but feel a little insecure. I now had a sexual relationship with two men and was going on a date with a third. Societal pressure was a powerful thing, and society had a lot to say about women who did this.
But it wasn’t like Riot, Cash, or Milo would judge me for it. Hell, they’d done this before! It might have felt insane to me, but it certainly wasn’t to them. They were even still friends with Violet after that whole relationship. They were still bandmates, as close as anyone could be. Which meant that the three men were emotionally secure enough to handle sharing a woman.
That was one of the things I was most skeptical about: their ability to share me without fighting about it. Because men were usually jealous and didn’t want to share their toys.
Thinking of myself as one of their toys made me grin. Yeah, deep down I wassuperinto this.
It was just sex. We didn’t need to overthink it.
Sure, I didn’t want to become a groupie when I agreed to join their tour. But I didn’t really care anymore because I was havingfun.
Now I just needed to get a gut check from someone I trusted.
“There’s my world-hopping rock star friend!” Meghan said when she picked up the phone. “It’s about time you called me. Texting isn’t the same—I’ve missed your stupid voice.”
“Miss you too,” I replied with a laugh. “Sorry for not calling sooner, but I haven’t gotten much alone time on the tour bus. We’re in Chicago now and I have a hotel room all to myself.”
“Such luxury! Ahotel room!”
“You joke, but yes, this feels like luxury.” I sighed in my bathrobe. “I have a lot to tell you.”
“I bet! Have you hooked up with everyone in the band yet, or are you still being a prude?”
“I know you’re joking, but…”
I filled her in on everything from the past few weeks, beginning with Riot on the roof of the arena in Atlanta, Cash in the thrift shop changing room, and then ending with Milo asking me out.
“First of all, I’mfuriousthat you waited this long to tell me,” Meghan said. “But I’ll put that on pause because I’m SO FREAKING EXCITED ROXIE!”
She shouted so loudly that I had to hold the phone away from my ear until she stopped yelling.
“I knew this would happen!” she added. “I kept it to myself, but I’ve been secretly hoping you would let them bang your brains out.”
“Uh, you didn’t keep anything to yourself. You explicitly told me you wanted me to sleep with them.”
“Stop nitpicking my enthusiasm! I’m stuck at home and have nothing exciting going on in my life.”
“I’m glad that I’m basically a source of entertainment for you,” I said dryly.
“Good! You should embrace it. Also, it’s about time the roles were reversed. You’ve spent the last year enjoying all the drama surrounding Jeff and I trying to get pregnant.”
