His confession does nothing for me. My heart doesn’t race, not the way it does with Easton merely being in hispresence. I lean in anyway, starved for attention. I need to feel wanted, even if it’s only for tonight. Even if it means nothing beyond the walls of this bar or the flatbed of his truck.
Boone leads me to the dance floor, as I let myself pretend he can fill the empty space. The shots of whiskey catch up with me, and before I know it, his arms are holding me upright more than my own legs. The room spins as he works me across the floor. His hand resting flush against the small of my back, he pulls me tighter as another couple passes us, whispering something I don’t quite catch.
“I need to get some air,” I excuse myself, my voice softer than I intend, as I push from his tight embrace.
“Sure, Teag.” He nods without argument. “I’ll take care of our tab and meet you out there.”
Outside, the cool air hits me like a slap. It cruelly steals the warmth from my skin. I inhale deeply, filling my lungs with the dry night air, but it doesn’t steady me the way I want it to. The parking lot stretches out in front of me, empty and quiet, the ground tilting faintly beneath my feet.
I press my palm against the side of the building in an attempt to ground myself. My head tips back, and I squeeze my eyes closed for a moment.
I wish I didn’t care this much. I wish he didn’t have this power over me.
I fumble with my phone, my fingers clumsy as I drag it from my pocket. The screen lights up too brightly, forcing me to squint.
I scroll through the contacts until I find the one I need.Bunkhouse.I stare at it longer than I should, my thumb hovering above the screen.
He keeps pulling away and building his walls higher. Shutting me out before I can get too close.So why does it still feel unfinished?
My thumb presses call before I can stop it. If he doesn’t want this, I want to hear him say it. Clearly, so I know I need to put this foolish crush behind me.
The phone rings in my ear, the sound loud in the quiet. Each tone stretches longer than it should, winding tight around my chest. My heart pounds hard enough to hurt, each beat heavy and unsteady.
I stare out at the dark horizon, my shallow breath fogging the night air as I teeter between hope and humiliation.
I don’t know what I’ll say if he answers. I don’t know how to pretend I’m fine, how to pretend he doesn’t matter when every part of me betrays the truth. I don’t know what I’ll do if he doesn’t answer, either.
All I do know is I can’t keep pretending there’s nothing here.
Not when every silence between us feels louder than words.
“Hello?” His voice is so rough and cautious, I’m not sure if it’s him.
I lie on my back, staring at the ceiling of the bunkhouse, the darkness broken only by thin strips of moonlight slipping through the blinds. The air has cooled since evening, the scent of dry grass and dust drifting faintly through the cracked window.
Sleep refuses to come. While my body is exhausted, my mind is not.
Every time I close my eyes, I see her in the doorway.Teagan.Frozen in place, like she’d stepped into something she hadn’t meant to witness. Or maybe something she had. Her stare was hungry in a way she probably didn’t even realize. And God help me, I hadn’t wanted her to turn away.
That’s the part that settles deepest in my soul. The part that leaves behind the most shame. Not that she saw me, but that I wanted her to stay. I wanted her to keep looking. I wanted it almost as badly as I wanted to cross the room. If I closed the distance, I could find out whether her skin felt aswarm as it looked, and if her body would soften beneath mine, just like it did in my dream.
Rosie had filled every corner of me. There had been no space left for anything else. Loving her was like breathing—constant, effortless, and necessary. And now there is nothing but emptiness where she used to live. Empty space that Teagan is beginning to step into without permission.
I drag a hand over my face, exhaling slowly into the dark.
This is exactly the kind of weakness I came here to outrun.
The phone rings, the sound cutting through the silence like a gunshot. I bolt upright, disoriented for half a second before the ringing comes again, my heart already racing. No one calls this late without a reason.Actually, no one calls this phone.I swing my legs over the side of the bed and stand, the floor cold beneath my bare feet. The phone buzzes against the counter by the refrigerator. It rings again as I wrap my hand around it and lift it to my ear.
“Hello?” My voice is rough, cautious, a whisper that doesn’t sound like me when I answer. The other side of the line is silent. “Hello?”
“Easton?” Her voice is soft and slurred. My stomach drops instantly.
“Teagan?”
A laugh spills through the receiver, uneven, breathless. “You answered.”
Relief and dread hit me at the same time.
