‘You are not,’ said Harriet gently. Thea leaned on the carriage as her friend regarded her by the candlelight. ‘Let me help, you can’t go on like this.’
Thea looked at the floor, not aware that she had looked so glum.
‘Come back with me,’ said Harriet. ‘Talk to me, Thea.’
Thea thought and was about to refuse, but Annie peered out of the window of the Hartford carriage.
‘Mr Fenwick and I can take the children home, Your Grace, of course. And Musket will enjoy a sleepover with Mrs Phibbs.’ Thea was about to protest, but Annie cut her off. ‘Please,’ she said. There was a polite firmness in her voice. Even the staff wanted her to cheer up.
She nodded. It was time to talk to Harriet.
At least she managed to eat at Harriet’s. She had struggled with her appetite over the three weeks since the robbery and Frankie’s exit from Herbert’s, but Harriet plied her with port and that seemed to help. Now she was full of cold meats, potatoes and melon. They repaired to the drawing room of the house on Porter Street that Harriet had briefly shared with Hugh before his departure. The house was terribly modern with high windows and a columned fireplace, but the fire was cozy and warm, and Thea felt herself sink into the voluminous sofa. Harriet sat at the opposite end, leaning back against the arm with a leg tucked underneath herself, exposing her petticoats in a way only good friends could once one had looked at the other’s bottom boils.
‘He’s in America, with a rancher,’ Harriet said, slurring slightly and waving a sixth glass of port that Thea wasn’t entirely sure was a good idea.
‘Who is?’ she asked.
‘Hugh, of course,’ said Harriet. ‘Mr Henry. He didn’t run off with a woman. He met acavalierewhen we were in Italy. They fell in love and now they are working together in America as ‘business partners.’’
Thea’s jaw dropped open. ‘No?’
‘Yes!’ said Harriet. ‘You can do that, it seems, when you have no bloody family to please.’ Her voice was pure Harriet confidence, but she watched Thea carefully and the rise and fall of her chest above her stays was quicker than usual.
‘And what about you?’ asked Thea, careful to keep her tone neutral. ‘It must have been very stressful?’
‘Less so than you might think.’ Harriet looked at the fire now. ‘We kept each other informed and maintained the apartment together of course.’
‘And how did you entertain yourself?’ asked Thea. She hoped it would give Harriet a chance to talk, if she wanted to. Harrietregarded her a little more soberly – warily, Thea thought. She hated tiptoeing around her best friend like this, but despite the rumours about Harriet’s past, you could never be sure how a person would react to something so societally shocking as one person loving another in mutual consent. A person of their own sex, that was.
‘Did it shock you when I said Hugh went off with another man?’ There was an uncharacteristic quiet to Harriet, and she looked between both of Thea’s eyes, alert for any sign of distaste. Thea was determined to give her friend no cause for concern. This was important, and her quickening pulse told her so.
‘Unfortunate for you, but good for him, I say.’ She fixed Harriet with a look that she knew she would understand. ‘If they loved one another, I see no harm.’ She was relieved to see Harriet’s shoulders relax a little.
‘Not unfortunate for me,’ said her friend, growing in confidence.
‘What did you do?’ Thea noticed her own hands were shaking a little – with both nervousness and excitement, she supposed.
‘What I did…’ Harriet paused, put down her glass of port, and considered Thea carefully as she spoke. ‘…Was women.’ Harriet still watched for Thea’s reaction who knew there was deep anxiety underneath her friend’s bravado. She felt her lips quirk up a little, but her heart still raced. Speaking about this out loud was unheard of.
‘You mean?’ She allowed Harriet chance to confirm.
Harriet nodded. ‘Emotionally. Romantically.’ She paused. ‘Physically.’
Thea’s heart flooded with relief and joy. She could think of nothing to say but, ‘how many?’
Harriet snorted, half with surprise, half with relief, Thea thought. There was a pause, and then, ‘I sort of lost count,’ she said. ‘There are plenty of places out there. Not legal, of course,and you can’t be found out or the penalty is…’ she drew a finger across her throat in a cutting motion. ‘But if you are discreet...’ She looked upwards at Thea from a downturned face, and her grin was huge and mischievous.
Thea stared at her, surprised, despite herself. ‘You are quite the boldest person I have ever met,’ she said. ‘Was there anyone in particular, or was it a honeymoon made up of a stream of ladies for you and gentlemen for Hugh?’
Harriet sank back into the sofa arm, apparently content at the lack of outrage and now encouraged to continue. ‘There was one, now you mention it,’ she said, a dreamy look clouding her face. ‘She was a society lady and quite the beauty, I have to say.’
‘And what happened?’ asked Thea.
‘She was married to a diplomat, and I had to make a show of coming home when Hugh left,’ said Harriet. ‘Sad though, I would have given every one of the Italian ladies up for her.’
Thea considered Harriet carefully. She didn’t know if she should ask but doubted she would get the chance again for some time. ‘Has there been anyone else?’ she asked, drawing her feet further underneath herself so she could lean forward. ‘In the past? Anyone special?’
Harriet retrieved her glass and took another swig. She picked at the back of the sofa, her countenance turning from joy to melancholy. ‘I assume you are talking about Emma?’ she asked. Thea nodded to confirm. ‘I suppose I am lucky in that it came out and yet we are allowed to go on. I assume that you heard. Most people did.’
