She said she could see a spark between the two of us. When I told her Blake is demisexual, she smiled, shook her head, and laughed, reminding me just how much I didn’t know. She confided in me that she is demisexual, too.
She said that when she finds herself attracted to someone, it’s because of who they are, the bond she makes with them, and the connection she feels.
After seeing how things are between Blake and me, she said she wouldn’t be surprised if Blake has feelings for me as well.
I guess my feelings for him were written all over my face, because she also broke the news that every single one of my friends knows I’m crushing hard on this man, without even having to say a word.
Does Blake know? Can he see it? Does he feel the same way, or is he afraid to turn me down and hurt my feelings?
With the way he’s looking at me right now, I’m feeling far too much hope than I should allow myself to feel.
“Hey, you two!” Val calls out, breaking the moment. Blake takes a step back, looking over to Val.
I send her a death glare that I hope she can see. He might have kissed me! Damn it, Val.
“You want a burger or steak?”
“Ah, burger is fine,” Blake calls back.
“Steak,” I answer.
“Coming right up!” She heads back over to the grill.
“Ah, we should go get changed before eating,” Blake says, moving towards the ladder.
“Yeah,” I agree, hating the bite of disappointment I feel.
Once we are out of the water, Blake heads into the pool house. Grabbing my towel, I wrap it around my shoulders and sit on the edge of my deck chair.
“Hey.” Tabitha sits down next to me. “How you doing?” There’s a hint of humor in her voice.
“I wanted him to kiss me so bad.” I groan into my hands.
“I could tell,” she laughs. “If it helps, I think he might have if Val didn’t step in.”
“You think?” My head snaps up, excitement thrums through my body.
“I mean, I can’t speak for Blake, but I see the way he looks at you, and I saw what happened in the pool. I think he likes you. I just don’t know if he’s realized that yet.”
“So what do I do?”
“Just keep doing what you’re doing. Keep being a good friend and a safe place for him. Most of all, be patient. I remember the first time I developed feelings for someone. It’s thrilling, but it’s also scary and can be confusing. Don’t rush, don’t push. Just be there.”
“Okay.” I nod. “Yeah, I can do that.”
“You really do like him, don’t you?” She gives me a soft smile.
“More than I’ve ever liked anyone in my life.” I sigh. “There’s something different about him. At first, he comes off cold and closed off, and he has every reason to be that way. But when heopened up, when he showed me who he really is, fucking hell, Tabby, I didn’t stand a chance.”
“Damn it, Coop. I think you’re in love.” She laughs, bumping my arm.
“I think so too.” And while the feeling is amazing, it’s also terrifying. What if Blake doesn’t feel the same way about me, and never does?
It’s not a deal breaker for me. I’m not going to stop being his friend. How would I move on, though, and find someone else, when he’s always going to be in my life? At least I hope he will be.
“You’re overthinking, Cooper. Breathe. Relax. Don’t think too far ahead. Live in the moment and see where it goes.”
“I’ll try.”
