But Ronan had cared, and when he’d given me the justice for my mother that I hadn’t been able to get on my own, I’d felt a connection with him. It was like he’d become the father I’d never had. And he’d brought with him a slew of big brothers who were always watching out for me.
“Are you okay?” he asked gently.
I shook my head because I really wasn’t. I was usually better at hiding my feelings, but today had been too close of a call. “Did you find Dylan?” I asked. I had no doubt Sage and Cash had already told Ronan about my friend.
“Not yet, sweetheart, but we will. Mav’s hacking his gaming accounts to see what he can find out about him.”
I nodded against Ronan’s chest. I hated that I knew so little about Dylan, but he’d refused to even tell me his last name. Like most gamers, we’d had a strong bond when it came to the online world we escaped into each day, but the real world was very different. Dylan was a lot like I’d been before Ronan had found me.
Withdrawn.
Distant.
Emotionally unavailable.
But online he was very different. We’d chatted endlessly about our avatars and the games we both loved, and he’d come alive. When I’d heard the fear in his voice just a few short days ago, I’d felt that familiar sense of helplessness come over me.
The same helplessness I’d always felt as I’d watched my mother fall into relationships with all the wrong men.
Men who’d used her and thrown her away.
“We have to find him,” I said softly.
“We will, Daisy. I promise,” Ronan murmured against my hair.
I nodded because a promise from Ronan was as unbreakable as the strongest of metals. I just hoped Dylan could hang on longenough that when Ronan did find him, he could come back from whatever Lee had done to him.
Assuming he even survived it.
Ronan released me and I was quickly enfolded in Memphis’s arms. He whispered a lot of the same things to me as Ronan had, then released me. I automatically moved to where Cash and Sage were standing near the bed. Sage’s fingers linked with mine as he urged me to sit on the edge of it. I didn’t like that Cash moved away, but I could tell he was restless. His big arms were crossed over his chest and his expression looked hard and unforgiving.
It was oddly comforting.
Ronan grabbed one of the small chairs near the table and moved it so that he was sitting in front of me. “Tell me everything that happened from the moment you learned Dylan was in trouble.”
I nodded and carefully recounted the events of the past few days. Ronan asked me a lot of questions, but I didn’t have a lot of answers. He patted my knee and then went to talk to Memphis and Cash in a low voice. Sage stayed with me. His arm was around my shoulders and his fingers were stroking mine. It made me feel warm and safe. I noticed that Cash kept glancing our way from where he stood near the door talking to Ronan and Memphis, and it occurred to me that I probably shouldn’t be clinging to his boyfriend like I was. But when I tried to put some space between me and Sage, Sage refused to release me and Cash actually frowned slightly. His hard eyes held mine and I felt a million things go through me all at once.
I was instantly transported back to that night. I didn’t understand the need to please him, but it was there all the same. I remembered how he’d talked to Sage, how he’d ordered him to do things and spoken to him in that commanding voice and how Sage had seemed to feed off of it. Had Sage been feeling that little spark inside when Cash had spoken to him like that?
The same spark I was feeling now as Cash’s eyes softened as soon as I leaned back into Sage’s side?
God, it made no sense.
But I was too tired to try and make sense of anything anymore.
I let my eyes drift shut. I wasn’t sure how much time passed before Sage gave me a gentle squeeze. “Daisy, honey,” he said softly. I opened my eyes and saw that Ronan was once again sitting in the chair across from me.
“Daisy, I’d like you to come back to Seattle with me and Memphis. You can stay with me and Seth until we figure out what to do next. Until this Lee guy and Dylan are found, I don’t want you staying alone in your apartment.”
“I can’t go back there,” I interjected as even the thought of stepping back into what had once been my sanctuary terrified me to the bone.
“You don’t have to,” Ronan quickly assured me. “As soon as the police release the apartment when they’re done with their investigation, I’ll have someone pack all your personal belongings and have them brought to Seattle. When you’re ready, we can get you set up with an apartment or house out there. But Seth and I have plenty of room, so you can stay with us as long as you want.”
I should have been able to say yes without any kind of hesitation. I trusted Ronan implicitly and while being around him and his family would take some getting used to, I knew I’d feel safe.
But something had me holding my tongue.
And I knew what it was.
