“Never been surer of anything. But… but I need it to be like it was at the hotel.”
And there it was, in no uncertain terms.
“Where do you live?”
Elliot gave me the address and I realized it was within walking distance. But I was far too impatient. If I only had a few hours left with this man before I had to tell him who I really was, then I was going to take full advantage of it. “Your keys,” I said as I held out my hand. Elliot dug his keys out of his pocket and handed them over without question. “Which one is for your apartment?” I asked.
“This one.” He pointed to it and I nodded before sticking the keys in my pocket. Since it was too far to walk back to the hotel to get our cars, I said, “We’ll take a cab.”
“Can we stop by the bathroom? I need to wash my hands.”
I nodded, though I suspected what he really needed was a moment to himself. Part of me didn’t want to give it to him in case he changed his mind, but the other part knew that this choice was something he couldn’t be regretting at any point. I led him down the pier and waited near the railing while he went into the public bathroom. It was a single bathroom, so I didn’t have to worry about him encountering anyone in there.
I wasn’t as lucky, because as soon as Elliot disappeared inside, a familiar voice said, “What are you doing, Cruz?”
I didn’t bother looking at the man I knew was behind me.
“You were watching, Matias,” I said to my brother. “You know what I was doing.”
My brother leaned against the railing next to me. “This is dangerous,” he said. “There are other ways to get close enough to him to keep him safe.”
“You think I don’t know that?” I murmured. It stung to know that my brother disapproved of what I was doing, but I couldn’t explain the pull Elliot had on me, so how was I supposed to explain it to the man I’d idolized my entire life? The man who’d protected me from my father’s fists? The big brother who’d shown up in that darkened alley just like my assailants had known he would?
“Then why?”
I looked at Matias. “Does it matter?”
“No, I suppose not,” he responded.
I let my eyes rake over the brother who I no longer recognized. Physically, he hadn’t changed much since we’d left the military. If anything, he was a little more heavily built than he had been, probably from all the extra hours he spent in the gym trying to burn off the rage and guilt he was feeling about the events of that night in the alley more than two years ago. But little else about him was familiar.
At ten years older than me, he’d never been an overly demonstrative kind of guy, but the coldness was new and something I’d never get used to. He never smiled anymore, never interacted with me beyond talking about the information relating to the cases we worked for Ronan together. We’d never talked about the night of the attack, and even after two years, he spent every free moment trying to find the single assailant who’d gotten away. The Matias I’d known growing up would have wanted to know what I was feeling – what Elliot was making me feel – but this Matias wouldn’t care.
Because this Matias couldn’t feel.
I decided to change the subject and said, “Anything?”
Matias had been following us from the moment we’d left thehotel. I’d planned it that way in order to give Elliot more of my attention so I could build a rapport with him. But the plan had never been to getthisclose.
“No,” Matias said, then he was straightening. “Be careful, little brother,” he murmured before he disappeared into the shadows again. Seconds later, Elliot came out of the bathroom. He was visibly nervous as he approached me.
“Ready?” I asked, fully prepared for him to tell me he’d changed his mind about what was about to happen.
“Ready,” he said softly, then lifted his head just a little. I happily gave him what he wanted and settled my mouth on his. I kept the kiss relatively tame compared to the one we’d shared at the end of the pier and then took his hand in mine. Matias’s words rang in my ear, but it didn’t matter. I couldn’t be careful because I was already in too deep.
But I couldn’t bring myself to regret it.
Chapter 5
Elliot
He wasall over me in the cab and I couldn’t have been happier about it. I’d tried protesting at first when Cruz had begun kissing me in the back seat and rubbing his hand up and down my thigh, but when he’d wrapped his fingers around my neck in a gentle grip and ordered me to keep my eyes on him, I’d forgotten all about the cab driver.
I hadn’t been able to keep my eyes on him, but only because I couldn’t keep them open. The things he was doing to me just felt so damn good.
I’d been kissed by a few guys over the years, but nothing they’d done compared to what Cruz was doing to me. It felt like my entire body was on fire.
But the best part?
