But I wasn’t going to rush anything with Eli now that I finally had him to myself for a little while. With the demands of hisinsanely busy schedule, there were days when I didn’t even get to talk to him, much less make love to him.
“Mav, please,” he begged as he slid his hands down my back.
“What, baby?” I asked, though I knew perfectly well what he wanted…needed.
“So close,” he breathed against my mouth as he rolled his hips against mine. But there was only so much stimulation he could get from moving against me since I weighed so much more than him.
“Eli, open your eyes,” I ordered and he instantly did. “I’m gonna let you come, baby, but then I’m gonna start all over again, okay?”
“Come with me,” he urged.
I pulled out of him before shoving in hard and deep and he let out a loud moan. “No,” I said as I did the move again. “Wanna see you come apart.”
I didn’t give him a chance to argue with me as I rolled my hips against his again. He cried out in pleasure and I felt my own balls tighten. Fuck, I might not even be able to keep my promise.
I reached behind me to grab Eli’s hands and I pinned them both to the bed by the wrists. I held him down as I increased my thrusts and Eli bucked against me desperately as his orgasm began to take over. I could feel his cock leaking against my abdomen and I knew he was so far gone he wouldn’t need any extra stimulation at all. Which was good because I didn’t want to release him as I began ruthlessly fucking him. I hated to think it was part of my earlier insecurities resurfacing and I was trying to regain some semblance of control by the extra show of dominance, but clearly it wasn’t bothering Eli in the least because he was frantically urging me on with his body and words.
“God, yes, harder Mav, please! Fuck, I love you so much!” Eli bit out as his eyes opened and held mine.
“Tell me you’re mine!” I demanded as I suddenly came to a complete stop.
Eli let out a ragged whimper, but managed to get out, “Yours, Mav! Only yours!”
I slammed into him. “Again!”
“I’m yours, Mav. Always yours!”
I pounded into him again so hard that he would have slid up the bed if I hadn’t been holding him down. He had absolutely no control, but I knew that, in reality, he was the one with all the power. But I also knew it wasn’t something he would ever use against me.
It took just three more hard strokes to finish him and when he screamed in blissful agony, it was my name that he called out. His inner muscles clamped down on my dick and despite my promise that I was going to let him come and then start all over, I felt my own orgasm start to roll over me in a violent wave. I let out a harsh curse as I rammed into Eli, his muscles pressing down on my dick, causing my orgasm to climb even higher. I released his hands and wrapped my arms around his upper body, dragging him against my chest. His fingers bit into my shoulders as my body began to jerk against his and my release shot from my aching cock. Tears stung my eyes at how good it felt and as my hot cum bathed my own dick, I searched out Eli’s mouth and kissed him as I rode out the uncontrollable pleasure of my orgasm. When the intense pleasure/pain finally eased, I dropped all my weight on my lover and tried to catch my breath. Eli’s huffs in my ear told me he wasn’t any better off than me. But when I tried to move off him even a little, he tightened his hold on me and I felt one of his hands close over my ass to urge me even deeper inside of him. The delicious aftershocks were still rippling through me so I tucked myself up into Eli’s body until there was no place left to go and then I kissed him.
“Missed this,” Eli murmured tiredly between soft kisses.
“Me too,” I admitted.
Eli’s hand brushed my hair back from my face and over my shoulder. “Mav, I know this has been hard-”
I cut him off with a kiss. “We’re making it work, Eli. That’s all that matters.”
He nodded solemnly, but I knew it still bothered him. We’d both logically known that medical school would be a huge commitment and that our time together would become much more limited, but the reality of it was even worse. The sheer exhaustion Eli was dealing with from classes and studying was overwhelming and I wasforced to watch helplessly as he tried to endure it. That wasn’t to say he didn’t enjoy his studies because he did. But trying to balance the demands of his education and our relationship wasn’t easy on either of us and we knew it would only get worse as the years went on. But I wouldn’t change any of it.
Not one thing.
The pride at knowing this smart, passionate, beautiful young man was all mine went beyond anything I could explain. But I hated that it also drove my most secret insecurities. In my heart, I knew Eli would always put me first, but my head was playing many of the games with me that it had when I’d been younger. And instead of trying to convince me that Eli would leave me, it was trying to tell me that I was holding him back. It was a voice that had grown louder and louder after I’d bought the engagement ring a few days ago.
It hadn’t been a spur of the moment thing…I’d known from the first day that we’d moved in together that I wanted it to be permanent…that I wanted to bind Eli to me in any and every way that I could. Hell, I’d known that from almost the moment I’d met him. But when I’d gotten the ring home, I’d panicked as I’d thought about what Eli’s family would think. Like I’d told Ronan and the guys, my plan hadn’t necessarily been to ask Dom for permission to marry his son, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that his approval was exactly what I was seeking. Which made no sense since the man hadn’t ever given me the impression that he didn’t think I was good enough for the kid he shared no blood with, but who he thought of as his just the same.
No one in the entire Barretti clan had made me feel that way either, but my brain was convinced that behind closed doors, it was a different story. I forced the disturbing thoughts away and focused on Eli’s sated body. His lids were heavy so I carefully pulled free of him. His eyes fluttered back open and he wrapped his arms around my neck. I rolled us so that I was on my back and he was curled against my side, his head resting beneath my chin.
“I love you Mav,” he whispered against me, his breath gently washing over my skin.
“I love you too,” I said softly before dropping my mouth to kiss the top of his head. “Just sleep, Eli,” I urged and I felt him snuggle into me. I knew he couldn’t have been all that comfortable with the evidence of his release cooling all over his stomach and chest, but he couldn’t fight his exhaustion and he was asleep within a couple of minutes anyway. I’d clean him up later, but for now I just needed to hang on to him.
The four months we’d been together had been amazing despite the challenging adjustments. There’d been some difficult weeks for Eli after we’d learned that Brennan had been raped by Memphis’s ex. Eli had taken on the responsibility for making sure Brennan got what he needed, even though it had cost him emotionally. He was still dealing with trauma of his own rape at his stepfather’s hands, especially since the man was adamantly fighting the charges and threatening to expose Eli’s past as part of his defense. And that didn’t even factor in the trouble we were having with Eli’s stepbrother, Caleb.
Saying Caleb was a mess was an understatement. In short, the young man refused to interact with any of us. He and Eli’s mother Mariana, were living in a condo about ten miles from us. Mariana had found work with a non-profit that supported veterans and their families, but she’d been struggling with Caleb from day one. He’d refused to go to therapy and even when we’d forced him to attend a session with Eli and Mariana, Caleb had merely sat there and stared at the wall. He’d barely spoken since his father had been arrested and we hadn’t been able to make him go to school. Early on, Mariana had driven him to school each morning and watched him go in, but by the time she got home, the school had called to say Caleb hadn’t shown up. He would eventually return home, but wouldn’t say where he’d been and he wouldn’t respond when we tried to talk to him. Mariana was at her wits end and so were Eli and I. And of course, Eli blamed himself for not having done something about his stepfather sooner.
I felt Eli stir against me and waited to see if he would wake up. He didn’t, so I gently rolled him onto his back and then went to the bathroom to get a washcloth. I cleaned him off and then got himunder the covers. As soon as I was settled next to him, Baby jumped up onto the foot of the bed and settled his big frame against Eli’s feet. I wrapped myself around Eli and let my finger trail over his left ring finger, imagining how the band I’d bought him would look against his beautiful skin.
