“Seth, don’t-” Ronan whispered harshly. His fingers were biting into my arms but I didn’t care.
“I’m so glad you survived. I’m so glad you came back to me.”
This time Ronan didn’t say anything; he just shook his head against mine and then let out a brutal, gut-wrenching sob. I knew the tears he’d shed before had been for Trace but these…these were for himself.
Chapter 25
Ronan
It tookme several long seconds to process what the heavy weight on my chest was, but once I did, I was glad I was laying down because the night before came back to me in such a rush, that I was sure it would have knocked me to my knees if I’d been standing.
I hadn’t understood the reason for Seth’s violent outburst when we’d gotten back to the hotel after dinner, but once I’d seen my actions through his eyes, I’d understood that I’d pushed him too far. I’d hurt him too badly. And then I’d only wanted to hurt myself. So that was exactly what I’d done as soon as I’d seen my own reflection in the mirror. But it hadn’t been enough and I vented all my grief and heartache on the rest of the room before giving in to the stunning realization that I’d lost Seth for good.
And then he’d been there before me and I’d known it would be my last chance. My only chance.
“Is this okay?” Seth asked, his breath gently washing over my skin where he had his head resting on my chest. His arm was wrapped around my waist and my arm was resting against his back. I didn’t remember taking our shirts off last night after he’d held mefor what seemed like hours. We were both still wearing the pants we’d each worn to dinner.
“Yes,” I said, my voice sounding hoarse. I ran my hand up and down Seth’s back and felt a sting of pain as I put too much pressure directly on the cut that slashed across my palm. The bandage was still in place, but I could see a little bit of dried blood on it. I lifted my hand and let my fingers trail through Seth’s hair. “Will you come take a shower with me?”
Seth nodded against me and then lifted up and kissed me gently. He got up and climbed over me and then searched out my hand and led me to the bathroom. As he got the water started, I began unwrapping the bandage but Seth quickly took over the task and when he had the bandage free, he carefully placed a kiss on an uninjured section of my palm. While I checked the severity of the cut, Seth got undressed and then he was working on my pants. His seeking fingers quickly distracted me from the gash on my hand.
“Does it need stitches?” Seth asked.
The feel of Seth’s hands roaming over my ass as he pushed my underwear and pants down had me asking, “What?”
“Your hand, does it need stitches?”
“No,” I managed to answer, though what I really wanted to do was kiss Seth and beg him to keep touching me. But he finished stripping me and then led me into the shower. I only managed to steal a few kisses as Seth took his time washing me and by the time he’d finished, I was painfully hard. I reached for the soap to return the favor, but let out a muffled moan when Seth’s hand closed around my cock.
“Tell me if you want me to stop,” Seth murmured as he began to drag his hand up and down my length. I hated that he felt insecure enough that he needed to ask, but I knew it was my own fault. I went to reach for his cock, but remembered my injured hand. The left hand would be more awkward to use, but I could make do. But Seth beat me to it because not only was he jerking me off, he had his other hand on his own dick, matching the same pace he was using on me. Despite my tired body, the pleasure began to flood my limbsand I put my hands on the tiled wall behind Seth. I thrust against him so that our dicks were touching as he worked us both. His mouth parted as he began to increase both the pressure and the pace and I couldn’t resist dipping down to steal into it. He moaned into my mouth just before he came and the second I felt his hot come splash against my own dick, I let out a shout and gave in to my release. Seth gently caressed me for a few more minutes as the high wore off and then I went about washing him as best I could with one hand.
Once we were finished with our shower, I dried off and began brushing my teeth but when Seth made a move to leave to get his own toothbrush, I grabbed his hand and pulled him back to me. I handed him my toothbrush and was glad when he took it without hesitation. I knew my neediness was off the charts because even the idea of being apart from him for the few seconds it would take for him to get his toothbrush was too much for me to handle right then. We didn’t bother getting dressed since it was still early and after Seth rewrapped my hand, we went back to bed and Seth instantly snuggled up against me.
“Where’s Bullet?” I asked.
“Cole texted a little while ago. He heard Bullet whining at the door so he took him outside.”
It was humiliating to know that Cole had witnessed my meltdown, but there was nothing I could do about it. All I cared about was figuring out where I stood with Seth. Because he still didn’t know what I’d become after Trace’s death.
“Seth, last night…the thing with Jonas-”
Seth cut me off with a kiss. “Just sleep, Ronan,” he said gently as he trailed his thumb over my cheek. “We have plenty of time to talk about everything.” He kissed me again. “I’m not going anywhere,” he said firmly. “I’m not going anywhere,” he repeated, more softly this time.
I felt tears threatening as hope began to bloom in my chest. Did I really have a chance of getting everything I wanted?
“Sleep,” Seth whispered against my lips. I nodded and closedmy eyes. Instead of moving back to my chest, I felt Seth’s mouth settle against the spot where my neck met my shoulder. For all the times I’d worried about how his touch would shatter me, I hadn’t even once considered that his touch could actually start putting me back together again.
But that was exactly what he was doing…what he’d been doing all along.
It was almostnoon before I woke up again. And when I didn’t feel Seth’s weight on me or his body pressed against mine, I jolted awake and sat up.
“Hey, I’m right here,” Seth quickly said, his hand settling on my arm. I tried to catch my breath as I realized he was sitting cross-legged near my hip facing me. Seth kept soothing me with his touch. “I ordered us some room service,” he said as he motioned to the food cart near the door. “I got you a BLT. You like those, right?” I nodded. Of course Seth would have noticed what I ate for lunch nearly every day while we’d been at his office.
“Did you eat?”
Seth nodded. “Do you want me to get yours?”
“No,” I said. I noticed Seth was wearing his sweats, presumably to answer the door for the food. “Is Mace here?”
