For now…
Chapter 2
TATE
Matty feltlike a dead weight against my shoulder as I lowered myself into the chair across from the stern looking older woman. Although she’d been the one to call me up to her tiny, partitioned desk that didn’t actually offer any privacy from the people sitting on either side of us, the woman didn’t acknowledge me as she continued to punch away on her keyboard. I tried to shift Matty to ease some of the numbness in my arm but when he stirred, I changed my mind and stilled until I felt him settle again. After all, he’d have to be fully awake soon enough.
I let my own eyes drift shut as I felt Matty’s warm breath against my neck. I wouldn’t have thought my life could get any worse after the night the dark, forbidding stranger had knocked me on my ass and pointed his gun at my head.
I’d been very wrong…again.
That day had been like any of the other endless days that I couldn’t seem to escape from. The morning had started off the same with trying to get Matty ready for pre-school. He’d been half-asleep as usual as he’d sat over his bowl of Cheerios and we’d barely caught the 7:35 bus. I’d been fortunate enough to find a small, friendly daycare just a few miles from our apartment that offeredpre-school classes to Pre-K kids and then watched the children for the rest of the day. The place was surprisingly clean and well run and I’d considered myself lucky to have found it since many of the other programs I’d looked at cost considerably more than I made bussing tables at a 24-hour diner in a less than perfect neighborhood.
Work had been as grueling and non-eventful as always and I’d only been twenty minutes late in picking Matty up which was significantly better than my normal hour or sometimes even two-hour delay since the prick I worked for had no issue with making me stay well past my regular hours. And I wasn’t in any position to complain since I desperately needed the job. My plan had been to spend the night helping Matty with an art project he’d been working on for school, but the sight of the sleek, red sports car sitting in front of my building had blown that plan to hell. Matty had been upset with me at first when I’d told him that I had to work, but then he’d given me a look that was entirely too understanding for someone so young and I’d been the one fighting back my guilt as I’d handed Matty off to my neighbor, Ms. Parks, to watch for several hours.
My second job wasn’t a steady one, but it did pay well so I never said no when Roger Banks called me with an offer to unload the delivery truck that stocked his upscale night club. I’d suspected the man’s interest in me went beyond cheap labor, but I hadn’t been sure until that day because I doubted any other potential employer would have bothered to drive to my shitty neighborhood to offer me the work when he couldn’t get a hold of me via my defunct cell phone.
I’d met Roger through a co-worker at the diner who’d known about my situation, but I’d been too preoccupied with the never-ending demands of my new life to realize the good looking man was flirting with me at first. I should have been interested in him. He was stunningly gorgeous, successful and clearly had enough money to throw around. And he hadn’t hesitated to drop hints that I too could benefit from his wealth. But it hadn’t been until that same day that he’d shown up that I’d finally figured out what kind of a guy he really was, because as I’d walked hand and hand with Mattytowards the red car and watched the man unfold his long, trim body from the obscenely expensive vehicle, Roger hadn’t even spared Matty a passing glance. Not once as he’d spoken to me had his eyes shifted to Matty and even after I had introduced the little boy to him, Roger had refused to acknowledge his presence.
I’d spent the rest of the evening avoiding Roger’s leering glances as I’d unloaded endless crates of alcohol and it was only the stack of cash Roger had placed in my hand afterwards that’d had me agreeing to his offer of a ride home. He’d followed me up without asking and clearly hadn’t cared that I had no interest in his unwelcome advances…advances I’d allowed only because I’d needed the cash more than I’d needed to escape the touch of a man who made me physically ill.
But all of that had been pre-Hawke. Because I’d given up everything the second Hawke had walked out my front door. The moment I’d heard the door click into place, I’d rushed out of Matty’s room and flipped the flimsy lock that I’d known wouldn’t really keep the man out if he were inclined to return. I’d then grabbed Matty’s backpack along with the packed duffle bag I kept stashed in the closet by the front door before going back to Matty’s room and throwing some of his clothes into my duffle. I’d jammed the two toys I’d known he couldn’t live without into his backpack along with a couple of books and then I’d wrapped a small blanket around Matty’s sleeping body and had carried him out of the apartment. He’d woken up briefly, but his unfailing trust in me had had him looking around only for a second before he’d snuggled up against my neck.
After all, it wasn’t the first time we’d been in the exact same situation.
I hadn’t liked ditching the apartment, especially since I’d just paid the entire month’s rent a few days earlier. But I’d had no doubt the dangerous looking Hawke would be back at some point. I’d seen the hatred in his eyes when he’d knocked me to the floor after pushing his way into my apartment. And the way he’d grabbed Matty…no, I wasn’t going to risk another encounter with the man. Especially since I knew he probably wouldn’t find what he was looking for just because he now had names to go with the men he was hunting.
I’d ended up finding a cheap motel on the other side of town and Matty and I had spent most of the weekend hiding out there. I’d moved us to another motel two nights later and then another one a few nights after that. I hadn’t returned to work at the diner and I hadn’t risked taking Matty back to daycare despite his insistence that he had to turn in his art project. The project - which I’d ended up leaving behind in the apartment – was a family self-portrait that had only taken Matty a few minutes to re-create after I’d told him I would hang it on the wall of our motel. Ironically, seeing the two stick figures hand in hand outside a colorful little house next to what I could only assume was a dog, had given me the strength I’d needed when all I’d really wanted to do was let my body fold in on itself in a desperate attempt to escape the reality that was slowly drowning me.
I’d finally started to feel more at ease about a week after Hawke had left, though I still hadn’t been brave enough to return to the apartment to try to get the rest of our belongings. I had no doubt that my job at the diner had already been given away and I’d briefly considered going to Roger’s club to see if he had any work for me because the little money I had stashed away was dwindling at a rapid rate. I’d even floated the idea of asking Roger for a loan, but then I’d remembered the feel of his clammy lips on my neck and the look in his eyes that said he knew that, in that moment, he owned me. I’d seen that look every day of my life for longer than I could remember and as hard as the last two years had been, knowing that no one had the right to look at me that way again – that Matty would never know that look himself – made every struggle I’d endured worth it.
But all that had changed two days ago when I’d been getting Matty dressed and I’d noticed the bruises. The same bruises I’d seen a few weeks earlier that I’d attributed to him roughhousing with other kids at daycare.
They’d had nothing to do with roughhousing.
And they had changed everything.
Everything.
“Mr. Travers, I’m afraid we’re still having some issues with getting the Medicaid paperwork submitted for Matthew. Would you mind confirming this is the correct social security number?” the woman finally said to me as she glanced at me over her glasses and then turned her computer screen my way so I could see the number.
I swallowed hard and said, “That’s the correct number.”
I’d become a consummate liar in the past several years, but it wasn’t something I would ever become comfortable with so I dropped my eyes when I answered her.
She punched the keys on her keyboard and waited several long seconds and then shook her head. “I’m afraid it’s not going through. You’ll need to contact them yourself to try to resolve this,” she said as she shifted her chair and folded her hands on the desk. “Until then, I’m afraid I’ll need you to pay up front.”
“What?” I asked in surprise. “I…I don’t have that kind of money,” I whispered.
There was little pity in the woman’s eyes as she studied me. I knew what she was seeing. Worn, ripped jeans that were just a little too big for me, a faded green Henley that had stains I still hadn’t figured out how to get rid of and a tattered leather jacket that was about ten years out of style.
“We can set you up with a payment plan, but I’ll need ten percent of the balance today.”
I did the calculations in my head and felt my stomach drop as I realized I didn’t even have enough money saved up to cover half the upfront payment she wanted.
I shook my head. “I’m sorry, I…I could do a hundred dollars,” I offered desperately, though even that amount would hit me hard. I’d been on such a roller coaster of emotions since my visit to Matty’s pediatrician two days earlier, that I hadn’t even thought this far ahead.
“I’m afraid that we’ll need the full ten percent today before you’ll be able to see Dr. Spengler. We do accept credit cards.”
