Continuing my story, I told them about Ryan. About how I couldn’t stand the thought of him returning to normalcy, of him getting to live the rest of his life in relative peace without suffering the consequences of what he’d done.
“I have a really bad feeling about where this is going,” West said.
“I killed him,” I confirmed, instantly experiencing discordant sensations of relief and dread. Though they were my brothers, and I trusted them implicitly, I’d spent sixteen years holding onto this secret. Sharing the burden with other people now was equal parts cathartic and terrifying.
Both of their mouths popped open, and West inhaled like he was about to start asking questions, but I held up a hand.
“We’re not discussing particulars, so don’t ask. The less you guys know, the better.”
“Fair,” Finn said. “What does this have to do with this ‘job’ you need to do?”
I shot him an imploring look. West caught on only a fraction of a second before Finn, their eyes widening comically as my intentions sank in.
“You want to take him out.”
“I want to talk to him. But…I can’t guarantee things won’t go sideways. If I lay eyes on him and fucking lose it, I’m telling you not to be surprised.”
West rolled his eyes. “You say that like you’re the first person to kill a bad guy.”
“Hell, I did it a few months ago,” Finn supplied.
I shook my head.These stupid fucks.
“I really do want to just talk to him, then arrest his ass.”
“Okay, sure,” Finn said, getting up from the stool, West following suit. “Let’s gotalkthen.”
Happy they were on board without very little fanfare, we hopped in my truck and headed out of town. The location Trey sent me was deep in the foothills of the mountains, roughly an hour away from my house. I wasn’t in any hurry, though. I knew that little rat wouldn’t be going anywhere anytime soon if he could avoid it. He’d bedded down like a fucking bear in hibernation, certain no one would ever be able to find him out here, so far off the grid.
Most people probably wouldn’t have been able to track him down.
But most people didn’t have the skills and tenacity of Trey Lawless.
We didn’t speak. The twins were content to follow my lead, but every once in a while, the silence was broken by West muttering to himself or making noises of disbelief.
At one point, he leaned forward, head between the front seats, and hissed, “I can’t fucking believe Sheriff Hardass is akiller. Canyoufucking believe that?”
“You’ve killed people too,” I reminded him.
“For thegovernment.”
“Not Finny,” I grinned, and the offended twin socked me in the arm. “But you didn’t have to come.”
“It’s not that,” West said. “I’m just having trouble believing it is all.”
“I am the way I am because of that,” I admitted. “I’ve done the worst thing imaginable, and from that day forward, I vowed never to go to that dark place again.”
“Except now,” Finn pointed out unhelpfully.
I glared at him in the rearview. “I told you, I just want to talk to him.”
“Then what are we here for?”
“Back up. I’m going to need to bring him in, but I don’t trust anyone in the department right now. And Idefinitelydon’t trust myself.”
“Ohhhh,” West said. “You want us to keep you on the straight and narrow. Got it.”
Honestly, I didn’t knowwhatI wanted. I had no clue how this confrontation would play out, but if I decided to kill this fucker in an act of rage, I wanted people around me I could trust.
