“I don’t want to see you kissing Gatlin and not be able to do the same,” he rasps, waving a hand over the rest of my clothes until I’m lying completely naked in front of him. His eyes drift down over my body, and his hands follow, like he has to touch every inch to make sure I’m real and here before him.
“I don’t want to feel alone ever again.”
My heart cracks wide open because this is something we all share. Him. Me. Gatlin. Mathias. And even Jamison, although he might deny it.
He pulls me to him and tunnels his hand into my hair. “I don’t want to want you. Or need you.” His mouth drops to mine in a scorching kiss that annihilates every thought, and I moan as my body moves restlessly, wanting him on top of me, in me. As he jerks his mouth from mine, he breathes in a ragged breath.
I melt. “I’m sorry…”
He shakes his head. “I don’t want to hear you’re sorry.” When I open my mouth to ask what he does want, he presses a thumb to my lips. “I don’t want you to talk. Just feel. My tongue. My lips. My hands. Me. Surrounding you, touching you, inside you.”
He’s everywhere. Touching. Licking. I shift restlessly and arch into his hands, wanting more. Everything he’ll give me.He’s relentless in his need, almost forceful, as if he’s afraid I’ll stop him.
I gasp at the thought. That’s the last thing I want. I run my hands across his broad shoulders and down his shirt, undoing buttons as quickly as I can. I want his burnished skin against mine. I dip my head, tasting and kissing every revealing inch. His breathing becomes ragged as my tongue explores his incredible body. My hands move quickly, undoing his belt and pants, and shoving them down. Not wanting to break the silence, I look up with him, a silent demand in my eyes as my hands dip below his waistband to grasp him.
He pushes into my palm, and I slide my hand down to his base, then up again, watching his eyes briefly close at the sensation of my hand rolling down his cock. He exhales heavily and flicks his wrist to remove the rest of his clothes but also captures my hand as he pulls out of my embrace.
A plush pile of blankets and pillows appears beneath me. I lie back half-naked and stare into turbulent sea-green eyes full of need. His hand dips between my legs, and his eyes widen when he feels how wet I am. His thumb strokes me several times while his finger slides down and enters me.
My legs fall open in invitation, but I grab his wrist, needing him inside me more than anything right now. He grabs my hand and puts it over my head as he settles between my legs. Our eyes lock as he enters me, hard and throbbing, then stops.
My lids shut briefly at the sensation, and I arch to pull him in deeper. He pushes in an inch more, and I open my eyes and nod. Burning need streaks across my body, while heat races over my skin. I wrap my other hand around his back, nails digging in as he swivels his hips and pulls out, then thrusts in deep. Once, twice.
“Goddess, I’ve been dreaming of this moment for weeks,” he admits in a gravelly tone. He pauses and raises an eyebrow. Inod, not wanting him to take it slow. He immediately begins thrusting and filling me over and over.
Not once do his eyes leave mine. The steely determination in them demands surrender, and I give it to him, letting the walls around my heart fall. I want him to see what he means to me. Full transparency. If there is a way for us to be together, I want it. Whether the gods will let us have a future, I don’t know, but it hurts too much not to try.
Emotions swell, and my body trembles, getting closer to the edge. Little noises escape as the orgasm dances just beyond my reach. Satisfaction crosses his face, and he slides a hand between us to stroke me. Faster and faster, his hips and fingers move. There. That’s it. I grip his body and clamp down, exploding in waves of heat and fire. Moments later, he stiffens as his body follows.
Chest heaving, he drops his head onto my shoulder and doesn’t move for a minute. My hand slides over his back in a soothing manner. Eventually, he sits up and pulls out. Bereft but satisfied, I look up at him, wondering if this changed anything for us.
His face is blank as if he doesn’t want me to see his emotions, and a tear slips out of the corner of my eye. He sighs and covers me with his body but props his weight up so he can look at me. His thumb wipes the tear away.
“I don’t want to forgive you.”
His words cut deep, and for a second, I stop breathing.
“But I do. It’s my turn to apologize. I’m sorry. It’s taken me too long to realize the girl who opened the vase is not the woman in front of me. The past clouded my view of the present.”
I breathe out in relief, a harsh exhalation of the fear that gripped me for a second. He traces my features with the tip of his finger as his gaze follows.
“Here, in this world, I existed…until you came along and filled all my empty spaces. I don’t want to live without you.” His lips softly land on mine for a second, a silent punctuation at the end of the most beautiful words I’ve ever heard.
Hope fills every crevice of my body. My throat tightens with the urge to cry, but I know he needs words too. I smooth the hair from his face, then continue running my hands lightly across his shoulders and down his back, unable to stop touching him. He shudders under my light caresses. “I tried my hardest to keep my distance. Actually thought I succeeded.” I snort. “Until I had to live one day without you. All my walls crumbled fast. Everything felt hollow. There was no joy. The only thing that kept me going was my determination to find the panels and set things right for you.”
He swipes a lock of my hair and twirls it around his finger. “The panels don’t matter to me. I belong here. In this world. Fighting for you. For us. Do what you need to do, but it makes no difference to me.”
He’s willing to stay here. With me. I swallow hard at the lump in my throat. “What made you change your mind?”
“Caron made me realize that not everyone has had the luxury of someone in their corner. I want to be the one in yours.”
Damn this man.The simple statement fills my heart. I pull back, wanting him to be sure. “This could get rough. I don’t know what the gods are planning or how to win against them.”
“We’ll find a way,” he assures me, his confidence absolute. His lips dip to mine as he seals his words with a kiss.
Suddenly, he pulls back and cocks his head to the side, then waves a hand over the two of us, dressing us with little more than thought. “Much as I hate to cover this beautiful body, they’re back.”
I hear the front door open, then Jamison’s voice. “Phaedra, Gatlin has a surprise for you.” There’s a strangled note to his voice that makes me frown.
