I watched as the message notification at the bottom read ‘delivered’ and swallowed a lump in my throat. Almost immediately, she responded.
Kennedy: I love you.
Kennedy: Its ok.
Kennedy: I’ll see you tomorrow.
I locked the phone and tossed it on the couch.
It buzzed again as soon as it landed. I read Kam’s name across the screen. I shook my head and picked the phone up to shut it completely off when I read his words from the display.
Kam: Hey, stopped by your room earlier. I made it to the D! I’m down on the 8thfloor, but I’ll be in meetings all day so I’ll just see you at the wedding tomorrow. But I wanted to let you know I left the kit for the DNA test. I put it on the table.
My stomach dropped. It seemed like life insisted on reminding me that I didn’t get to deal with one thing at a time.
I looked around the suite and spotted the white box that stuck out like a sore thumb, on the table near the lamp. I walked over slowly, as if it might bite.
I stood there, staring at it, and thought about the baby’s face on Instagram again. I remembered Princess’s silence. I thought about how Yana texted me, not knowing exactly what happened, but she could feel something wasn’t right.
The kit looked too bare for how much chaos it held.
I picked up the box and opened it. Inside were instructions, a long cotton swab, and a tube halfway full of some substance that I didn’t recognize. After reading the instructions, I peeled the cotton swab out of its wrapper and unscrewed the top of the tube. For a moment, I just held it in my hand and stared at the cotton tip.
“Just do it,” I muttered.
Following the instructions, I swabbed the inside of my mouth. It seemed to be the easiest task for such a big outcome. It was more of a regular errand, like mailing off a package at the post office, yet my hands shook as I screwed the top on the tube.
I packaged and sealed everything up carefully, pressed the tape down, and set the kit back on the table. Then I stood there, rested my palms on the back of the chair, and lowered my head.
The room was quiet, and for the first time in a while, I felt it.
I pulled my arms up from the chair and stretched them high. My neck felt stiff.
“I’m tired.”
I walked into the main bedroom, sat on the bed, and looked around. The king-size bed with crisp, white sheets was centered against a padded, charcoal headboard. There were two nightstands with a lamp on each. I looked in front of me and noticed there were two bottles of complimentary waters placed evenly. Everything in the room seemed balanced, as if it was meant for more than just me, just as we intended.
Princess and I previously decided to get this suite and stay together in Detroit for the wedding. Yana had her own space, down the hall, in a room that sat on the opposite end of the hallway. I imagined Princess on one side of the bed, scrolling through her phone, and Yana running in and out of the room, asking about room service. I would be complaining about thewedding itinerary while Princess told me to relax. That had been the plan.
Instead, I let my bullshit ruin it. She and Yana had gotten their own room downstairs. She told me she needed space, yet I was the one who sat in the biggest one, alone.
I sighed again, long and heavy, as I reached over and unzipped my duffel bag. I pulled out my deodorant, soap, and toothbrush and stood. As I walked to the bathroom, I said a prayer in my head that God would let the water wash over me and take away the pain I felt throughout my body.
I was lying on the bed in the hotel robe when I thought I heard a faint knock on the door. With my face twisted in confusion, I grabbed the remote off the nightstand and pressed mute.
The knock came again, this time louder. I grunted, stood from the bed, and walked over. When I looked out the peephole, my whole expression shifted.
Yana stood on the other side of the door with a cheetah-print headband with a big bow and a silly smile that caused me to laugh out loud.
I opened the door immediately. “Hey, baby girl.” I opened my arms, and she fell into them. “What’s up?”
She pulled back, and I saw she had worn pajama pants and a hoodie. She had a small bag over her shoulder, and her eyes flicked past me and into the suite.
“Um, . . . I kind of wanted to spend the night with you, if that’s okay.”
I blinked. “Spend the night with me? Where your mom at?”
“She downstairs,” she said. “In the room.” I nodded slowly when I remembered. Yana stepped past me and walked insideas she continued. “She just got a regular double bed, and I know you got like . . . a whole extra bedroom in here, so I figured . . . why not?”
