At least getting an encouraging text from Val later will calm my nerves. She always knows exactly what to say, and I desperately need her hope right about now.
10
Val
I click on the voice text from Jabari.
“Hey, Val, I’m downtown meeting a retina ophthalmologist, and my appointment should be over around noon. Can we meet somewhere for lunch? I have a feeling I’ll need to talk about his prognosis.”
What’s on today’s agenda? I pull up my calendar to check if lunchtime is empty. A smile lifts my cheeks. For once, I don’t have a lunch meeting or have to be anywhere else, which means I’m free to meet Jabari. But where can we go without my family getting wind of it?
Fran’s out of town today, so that’s one barrier avoided. I take a peek at Jackie’s work calendar. She has a meeting down by the Navy Yard and our offices are closer to Dupont Circle. Dad has in-house meetings, so he’ll be occupied as well.
Clicking on the voice recorder button, I respond. “Sure. Do you want to meet at the Florida Avenue Grill at twelve thirty, or is that too far from your appointment?”
I wait to see if a message pops up. Unfortunately the three dots don’t show when someone’s composing a voice text. Before I push the phone away, a message appears.
“Perfect. I’ll meet you then.”
I bite my lip. Sometimes our friendship feels a little unreal. Yesterday Jabari wanted my opinion on whether or not he should tell reporters about his medical situation. He’s nervous about this appointment, so maybe he simply wants a friend to commiserate with if it doesn’t go to his liking.
Of coursethat’s it,Val. What more could it be?
What I’m still trying to make sense of is how Jabari and I slowly morphed into a familiarity where we message each other every day. I’ve told him all about my plant babies, and he’s shared about his shoe collection. Who knew guys coordinated shoes with their outfits too? Though his are mostly Warriors’ colors. Talk about team dedication.
Every day that I learn something new about Jabari, I’m left with two questions. How is this the same guy who cheated on Jackie? She loved every part of their relationship and thought he was The One. But when she said those three little words, he started acting differently. Then she found the DMs from Insta models and proof he cheated on her. She’d been heartbroken beyond belief.
Which makes me wonder, What will my friendship with Jabari do to my sister? She’s been my best friend from birth. Normally, we’re grabbing lunch together, setting up brunch dates on the weekend—with Ollie in tow of course. Hurting her is the last thing I want to do. There’s no way she’ll be okay knowing I willingly entered into a friendship with him. But I can’t discount that Jabari’s hurting right now and needs support.
Lord,what do I do? Am Iwrong to keep this from Jackie? Should I tell herand break the confidence Jabari is holding me to?
I drop my head into my hands and let out a little moan. Why does life have to be so difficult? Why is navigating relationships so hard at times? I love my family, I really do, but they exhaust me. It’s like they always want my best but never allow me an opportunity to flounder and fail like Fran did in her teenage years. Even Jackie went a little wild after her breakup with Jabari. Meeting Isaac has changed her for the better.
But me? Well, my parents always relied on me to be the dependable one. I’m the one who needed to choose the right degree, the right career field—being a permanent yes-man to my dad. My folks never worry about me, and every time we’re in a family setting—whether that’s with Dad and his new wife or Mom and us girls—I’m expected to behave a certain way.
Their expectations are quite stifling.
Maybe that’s one reason I’ve kept this forbidden friendship. It’s not just for Jabari. It’s not for Jackie. Not for Fran. Not to meet my dad’s expectations or Mom’s hope.
Jabari ismyfriend, and I’m his.
Guess you just neededa friend outside of family.
Is that such a bad thing? I mean, yes, my spirit’s telling me that lying—even by omission—will always be problematic and will never remain hidden. A chill goes up my spine. Regardless of my heart’s thoughts, my brain keeps wanting to make logical assumptions. Like how as long as I never tell Jackie and Fran, neither will ever find out.
As far as Raimo is concerned, matchmaking me with Jabari was a horrible mistake. He apologized profusely and even bought me a new plant to make up for it. That leads me to believe Jabari hasn’t shared how we still talk on a regular basis.
Someone raps their knuckles on my door, and Jackie’s face appears in the doorway.
“Hey. You need something?” I ask.
She nods. “I’m about to head to a lunch meeting. Do you mind picking up my dry cleaning for me today? I don’t have time to do it myself.”
“Sure.”
Relief flashes across her face, and she hands me her slip. “Thanks so much, Val. Are you still watching Ollie for me tomorrow?”
Yikes. I’d forgotten that. “Um, yes.”
