“Was it that obvious?”
“I totally believe that you didn’t meet up with him at McMurphy’s on purpose, but there was just… You guys were looking at each other in a way that most people only dream of. Like in that Ada-Lane-swoony-romcom movie type of way. You know?”
“No, I don’t.”
“Well, take it from me, you did. Both of you.” She’s silent for a long moment. “I know it’s probably too soon to know, but what’s next? Aren’t you still staying at Stacey’s neighbor’s?”
I groan. “Yes. I guess I’ll—I don’t know. Accept defeat? Crawl back home so my family can throw it all back in my face. That sounds like fun. Can’t wait to be berated for screwing stuff up again.”
We sit in silence, watching as the breeze sends a cup skittering across the lot.
“There may be some truth to their words, Avery.” She turns to face me. “I don’t think you sabotage yourself, butyou do tend to make things harder than they need to be sometimes. Just not in the ways you think. Not in the ways they tell you that you do.”
“I don’t need to hear?—”
“Just listen for five seconds.” She lets out a slow breath. “Your fatal flaw is not your ADHD or your attention span or whatever you’ve decided it is. It’s that you form yourself into what you think others want you to be. You ignore the things that call to you so you can fit into some little box of others’ expectations.”
“That isn’t true.”
“It is. And it’s okay. I’ve struggled with it too. It’s hard not to in the entertainment industry. Especially with the Kings. They expect us to keep up this perfect image, even when we’re falling apart behind the scenes. I’m grateful to dance for them, but being told to smile througheverythingis a lot.”
I stare at my toes, not sure what to say.
“Take it from me, a smile can only hide so much,” she adds, nudging my shoulder.
A smile isn’t a solution.Mary and Larissa both preaching the same to me was not something I saw coming. How could they both come to a conclusion I never saw? I push to my feet. “Can you just get me out of here? I can’t be here anymore.”
“What about your car? What about?—”
“Leave it.”
She nods, and we silently pile into her vehicle.
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
TY
Ramiel isquiet for a long moment. Sweat trails down my temples despite the icy shower I just took. The locker room is almost completely vacant, hence the only reason I feel comfortable telling him about my chat with Coach and a third party from HR earlier. Practice was excruciating after that. Did anyone else know? As I surveyed the guys and their reactions to me, I didn’t pick up on anything.
“So they’re hitting you with a fine?” Ramiel finally says.
I nod.
“Could be worse,” he adds.
“I know.”
Every team approaches contract violations differently, but there is one thing that is handled almost unanimously across the league. They view the cheerleaders as replaceable. It’s not fair, but it’s the nature of the beast. I don’t know much about that side of it, but what I do know is that cheerleaders have been let go for less than being caught inpublic with a team member. And Avery was living in my house.Livingwith me. If they only knew, maybe my consequences would have been worse or my fine a little higher.
I’m so stupid. How could I have let this happen? My stomach clenches as I wonder what happened to Avery. Why hasn’t she reached out to me?
“I can’t believe he told you before the game this Sunday,” Ramiel interrupts my sinking thoughts. “Figured they’d want to keep you focused on that.”
“If it wasn’t before this game, it’d be before another one. Season isn’t over yet.”
His voice lowers. “I don’t want you to get in your head about it, but you better keep your nose to the grindstone for the rest of the season. I’ve seen guys traded for less. It’s probably better if you… If you let her go for a while.”
Anxiety ricochets through me as the one thing I’d been fearing since joining the Kings comes to fruition. “I’m not in my head about it. She’s got somewhere else to stay, so she’s safe. I can focus on the rest of the season now.”
