CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
TY
Avery has ignoredme almost every day since I ran into her in the store. Well, her version of ignoring. Which is basically her just not making eye contact when she smiles and only saying “hi” instead of “howdy” if she happens to bump into me in the hallway. In the week since our accidental run-in, I’ve quietly replaced the dead orchids, which she didn’t acknowledge. I even moved them around the room—call it passive-aggressive—and she just quietly put them back in their rightful home in their perfectly-naturally-lit places in front of the window.
Despite the semi-cold shoulder, she’s done plenty of cute little things like make extra spaghetti with a flower-shaped sticky note attached to it in the fridge with details scrawled across it. Details that I try not to read too much into, like “accidentally made extra, thought you might like this” and “decided I hate this, the rest is for you.” Dolly is impartial to both of us, it seems. Some nights I see him scraping his paws across her closed door, and other times Ifind him perched outside mine, staring at me longingly. I’ve found he’s quite the comforting accessory to those late nights I can’t sleep and pass the time by reading chapter after chapter. He’s persistent, but I’ll admit, having him around has made this place a lot less lonely. Having him and Avery here has made this place even livelier than I could ever imagine. Even when she’s concerningly silent.
I’ve considered mentioning dance practice to her, but given the context clues, I figure I’d be pushing my luck. And I’m not ready for a rejection from her. The Kings had another win this week, but there were no more sideline glances from Avery, unfortunately. My mind drifts back to that moment often. Even though it got me swatted in the locker room, it was exhilarating. Like I was staring straight into the eyes of something I can’t have. It isn’tlikeI was. I was. If Avery’s distance has proven anything at all, it’s that regardless of how much I want her, I can’t have her.
With my mom’s impending Christmas wedding, I find myself at war with myself. At first, it seemed ridiculous that I may need dance lessons to participate in a wedding with my mom,but after our time spent together—though I enjoyed her for different reasons entirely—I now know that Avery’s a valuable asset. Despite her insistence that she’s too erratic to actually be of any help to anybody, Avery taught me a thing or two. I never would admit it to her face, but she was right. I’m not a great dancer.
And even with that one lesson, she helped me.
Changedme.
I suck in a deep breath. It doesn’t feel right to admit, but Avery is everything I never knew I needed, and I can’t even really explain how that’s possible. Is this how peoplefeel in all those books I shuffle into my “do not finish” pile? Those saps who confess their love too early, fall too quickly, and succumb to every bad thing that comes with letting someone infiltrate your thoughts, heart, and mind.
Maybe I was wrong to set those books aside. Maybe they had something right. Sometimes things happen without you realizing it.
Still, I can’t rule out the fact that maybe Avery is simply unattainable. Maybe my instincts are seeking her out strictly because I feel as though she’s something I can’t have. Maybe that’s why—how—I find myself standing shoulder to shoulder with Ramiel staring at the blinking sign above The Malted Mule, milling in for trivia night. Because I can’t be at home right now. I need space away from Avery.
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
AVERY
“Did you do this on purpose?”I press my phone tighter to my ear, an attempt to drown out the crowd droning on in The Malted Mule.
“No! Josh is super sick. He’s been living in the bathroom since last night. The stomach flu is no joke,” Larissa answers.
I sigh. “I know, it’s just… I haven’t spent any time alone with Ryan. Any interaction has literally been chaperoned by you.”
“Okay, I’m not achaperone.But don’t you think it’s time you do? You’ve only been on double dates with him. I think it’s time you feel it out or cut it off.”
“I guess, but I?—”
“You either like him or you don’t, Avery.”
I know she’s right. The thing is dumping people sucks. And Ryan is nice, it’s just that he’s not Ty. Why can’t I like someone normal that I don’t have to hide from the world like Ryan?
“You’re right,” I finally say.
“Of course I am. Look, Avery, no one is going to care if you give Ryan the boot. Well, Ryan might, but?—”
I groan.
“I’m just saying, you need to do what’s right for you. Not for us or Ryan or—” She’s interrupted by some loud hacking in the background. “Sorry about that. Josh is in a bad way.”
I grimace on my end of the line, ducking around a waitress carrying a tray of shots to a nearby table.
“You can always turn around and go home,” she adds.
“No, it’s fine. I’ll be fine!” Even over the cacophony of this dingy place, my tone’s too shrill.
“Your shriek says otherwise.”
“Can’t leave now. I’m committed.”
She clucks her tongue, but before I can ask what that’s about more hacking erupts in the background. “I have to go. Try to have fun, I guess.”
