“Bronx! Open the door, Baby!” Face scrunched up, I put the bat down to open the door for Brooklyn. The slur in his voice lets me know that he was full of that shit.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” I opened the door mid knock, and my eyes bucked when I saw he was knocking on it with the butt of his gun. As soon as he walked in, the smell of liquor smothered my nose. “Brooklyn, put that gun away and answer me,” I called out again. “What’s wrong?” The way he tried to stand in front of me and look sober was almost comical, but I didn't laugh because I could tell it was some deeper shit going on with him. Especially since I hadn’t heard from him since last night, and we literally talked all day now so that was already odd to me.
“I was out all morning looking for this nigga, and he ain’t nowhere to be found. My family gon’ try to handle this shit if I can’t get to that nigga, myself, and I don’t want them to. The twins will only stay out of this shit for so long. So, I was adamant as fuck about finding him today. Once I hit my last crack house looking for him and he still wasn’t sitting in the corner with a needle stuck in his arm, I went to the licka sto’ to clear my head. Then, I drunk that up and went back again, and again. Zoo called and said we needed to go holla at Sin about some shit he has going on. We started drinking too now I'm here tryna’ get answers from you.”
“Answers to what, Brooklyn? The only thing you need to do is go get in the bed and sleep that shit off. Matter fact, shower first then get in the bed. You smell like outside.”
He chuckled, then stumbled into the living room. “You sound like my mama. I used to hear that a lot as a shawty. ‘Brooke, you smell like an outhouse. You and Zoo better stay in or out my damn house. Out there chasing them fast ass girls. You better not make me a grandma early.’” The voice he put on was him trying to sound like his mama. “I’m gon’ miss her.”
Sympathy covered my heart as it went out to him. He had so much on his plate with his family and it had really taken a toll onhim. Sitting next to Brooklyn on the couch, I pulled his hand into mine, allowing my thumb to caress the back of it.
“And I hate the fact that I haven’t made her a grandma yet.” He eyed me seductively.
“Boy, gon’ you are drunk and not about to have my kids coming here with liquor on their breath because you shot up the club with liquored up sperm. Nope, not gonna happen.”
He chuckled again. “I wasn’t tryna’ fuck, Bronx. You just look good as shit right now, and I hadn’t seen you all day so forgive me for looking at my beautiful-ass woman. My mama would be upset if she heard you say you didn’t want to give her any grandbabies before she left this world. You know she like you.”
“Stop talking like she’s about to leave you. We have a while before we are even in the place to want kids. As of now, she’s good and she’s here. Don’t start getting in your feelings now because that liquor in you.”
“I ain’t in my feelings. All I know is my mama is sick as hell, you won’t give her a grandchild, my cousin could’ve gotten killed, and yo ex-nigga is the best crackhead to play hide and seek ‘cause I can’t find him for shit. No matter what I do, the bullshit in my life just keeps pilling up. All I want to do is be happy and live happier. As of lately, I can’t get this shit right for nothing in the world. What um’ gon’ do, B?”
“Stop drinking, for one.” Walking over to him, I took the bottle out of his hand. “Things will fall into place, you just need to sleep this shit off and start over tomorrow with a leveled head.”
The more I talked, the more he shook his head. “I kill better with a fucked-up head.” My brows snapped together while his stayed relaxed as if what he said was nothing to him. “A leveled head gon’ bring out the Brooke that my mama made, I need the Brooklyn that my daddy made. Both will blast yo’ ass to smithereens but Brooklyn, gon’ make sure you don’t survive that shit.”
“I get that, but Baby, it’s the middle of the night. He won’t be anywhere that you can see. So talk to me about what’s going on in your head.” These past weeks spent with Brooklyn had me caring more than I should have in such a short period of time. Caring about him, his cousin, and shit... us, to be honest.
With the type of dreams he’d been having, the worst part wasn't the outcome of Zoo, it was always the way he felt about me when he was sleeping. Although he said he did not feel a way about me, I knew he did. His dreams told me so. He didn’t lie to me about it, so I guess that’s a good thing but I knew it bothered him just as much as it bothered me when he told me that we broke up in his dream or how we had a big argument right before he woke up.
“My family will do anything to protect each other. From the oldest cousin to the youngest, we were raised to always look after the next person. With me being the youngest one, they still look at me like I’m a kid, and I’m not. I’m a grown-ass man. I know how to hold my own and protect them, too. The shit with Zoo, I was supposed to be alert enough to know that nigga was following us. I should have been protecting you and not let Teddy get close enough to us to even be able to pull out a gun to shoot either of us. To my family, Zoo did what was right, to me... the shit was dumb as fuck. I know there's no right or wrong way to protect, but he should have just let it be me. I hate myself for this shit.”
I sent out a text while still giving Brooklyn the attention he needed. He needed to let all of this shit out and I wouldn’t have been able to calm him if he got anymore worked up. Standing to his feet, he paced the floor. Looking back, he saw the bottle that I took from him on my console table then walked to grab it. He downed that before walking over to my bar area in search of more.
“Come on, Baby. I’ll get you something. Go back and sit down.” When I got in arm’s reach, he pulled me in and pressed his lips against mine. I didn’t pull back. I allowed him to kiss me. If that was going to take his mind off the liquor that he was in search of, then I’d give him all of the kisses that he needed.
Leaning back, he looked at me. The hurt in his eyes was on full display. “Usually, when I dream about you, I’ll always pray that they come true. This time, though, I’on want that shit to even be halfway true. This time frame shit is for the birds because I could give a shit about that. All I know is, I want you, and I love you.” Leaning in, he pecked my lips again. “The crazy part is it’s not a sexual feeling I don’t want to let go of. We built what we wanted by being friends, first. I can’t lose my friend, Bronx. I just want the dreams to stop.”
“I know, Baby, and I’m here through it all. I hate your dreams, too, and maybe they are trying to tell you something. I just hope it’s the opposite of how they always end in your dreams.” When he opened his mouth to speak, a knock came at the door.
BROOKLYN
Seeing Zoo and Sin come through the door had me on edge like a muthafucka. Thinking the worst and not wanting to hear it, I tried to head out the house to get away from the news they were about to give me.
“Hol’up, go back inside and talk to us.” Sin pushed his hand to my chest to stop me.
“Nah, I’on even want to hear it. Just let me get to my mama to tell her bye.”
“The fuck is you talkin’ ‘bout, bruh?” Zoo frowned up at me. “Ain’t shit wrong with Auntie but she raised a hot headed, emotional-ass son. How you gon’ be fucked up in the head and a crybaby at the same time?” He said that shit as if that was supposed to make me calm down, it only fueled me.
“Who the fuck you calling a crybaby?” I stepped to Zoo, making Bri come between us. Sin just stood there, leaning against the wall like wasn’t shit happening but Bri was about to lose her shit.
“You! Now calm that shit down, ‘cause I hate for my mama to have to bury my ass ‘cause I know you gon’ do me bad if we start fighting.” We had a stare-down the whole time Bri stood between, trying her best to push us apart.
“Fighting! Sin, you not gon’ stop these fools? They are about to tear my place up.”
“They can pay to get it fixed. Let them handle this shit though because I’m tired of them my-damn-self. One of them need to take the other one to the upper room.”
“Siiiin, no they don’t. Stop them!” At the same time, Zoo and I started laughing, making Bri hit me on the chest and Zoo in his good arm. “Y’all some fucking dick heads and not the fat ones either. Dumb asses. Handle this shit so I can go back to bed... ALONE! Since you want to play games with me!” Bri yelled over her shoulder as she walked into the kitchen.
