He ignored her comment. “You’re so fucking determined. Tonight, I’d give anything, do whatever you tell me to do, just so you’d give me that present and my birthday hug.”
She was in his embrace, closer to him than ever, wrapped in his arms much longer than any birthday hug she’d ever given him. “Do you know what I’ve learned, Diesel?”
He kissed her ear. “Tell me.”
“That life is fragile and our existence is fluid. We should cherish the here and now, especially thegoodhere and now since there’s more bad.”
“Rebel—”
“Don’t patronize me by saying something asinine. I won’t care anyway because my feelings are my own.”
She twisted around to face him, but the darkness hid his features, shrouding him inmystery. She smelled his cologne, though. It was spicy and dark. Wicked. Like him.
He took her face between his hands. “You’re too young to be so cynical.”
Rebel shook her head. “Am I cynical or realistic?”
A noise escaped Diesel as if he planned to respond.
“Show me the good,” she inserted before he spoke.
“Here. Now. You and I.”
“As brother and sister, yes? Because there isn’t anything else. You have a fiancée and I have a boyfriend. And I’m still illegal, which tells me everything I need to know. You’ve seen one of the videos, if not all of them, so you think I’m easy and…and…stuff.”
“I haven’t seen not one of those fucking videos,” he snapped, releasing her so abruptly that she stumbled. “You’ve lost your fucking mind if you think I have.”
“Fine.” She didn’t necessarily believe him, but she didn’t want to get into a detailed discussion either. “Go back to your fucking party, Diesel. Jana is there. She’s probably wondering where you are. Stop being such a fuckhead to her.”
“I don’t want to talk about Jana. I want you to forgive me.”
“Fuck you. You wanted a happy birthday from me. You got that. I’m not giving you more.”
“Jana is a non-issue in this.”
“Yeah, because she’s made herself into one and you do nothing to tell her not standing up to you isn’t cool. It makes her look weak and pathetic.”
“You’re talking about her to ignore the problems between us.”
“No, fuckface, I’m talking about her because she exists.Kaiaexists. I want a chance with him. I care about him so much and I’ve treated him so unfairly. I wouldn’t want to live as his stand-in for a girl he really wants. It isn’t fair that I made him yours. You and him couldn’t be more different. He has a heart. You’re Frankenstein’s monster.”
He sucked in a breath and stiffened.
“I still fucking dare you to get your ass on your shoulders whenyoufucked overme.” Angry suddenly, she balled her fist and clipped his jaw. “How could you do that to me?” she demanded, starting to cry again, completely gutted at what he’d done. She’d had so much faith in him, more than anyone other than her mother. “I trusted you. I trusted you above everyone.”
His hands settled on her waist, but before he tightened his hold, she pulled away, turned and ran.
By the time she arrived at the gate to the Caldwell mansion, she was winded, sweaty, and sobbing. She didn’t care. She’d outrun Diesel.
One day, she’d outrun her demons.
The moment Rebel turned and ran, the darkness swallowed her. He’d just been able to make out her shape, but mostly he’d felt her presence. The ground lights only provided enough illumination for a clear path ahead.
But he didn’t have to see her to feel the sting of her words or to smell the fresh, citrusy scent of bergamot combined with the calming floral of lavender. Either her shampoo or body wash or both.
He thought about following her, but that would be the biggest fucking mistake of his life. Not only because he felt like shaking the fuck out of her. Or because she alone got under his fucking skin like no one else. Ever. Boyor girl, man or woman. Not when he’d been a child, a teenager, or a young adult.
She fucking annihilated him. Regularly. In one way or another.
