“Nobody knows what will happen in a week or in a year. I could die tomorrow, and I’d have no regrets. I’ve lived by principles all my life, and I won’t betray that code to save my ass at the cost of others. This is me, Allegra, who I’ve always been. Someone who protects what’s mine and the innocent. Me or a three-year-old kid with a bullet in his head. Me or a ten-year-old girl being raped. Pick, Allegra? Whose life would you save?”
“That’s not a fair question,” I said, and Shotgun sent me a look.
“Maybe not. But that’s the truth. Rapid City can’t be evacuated. Civilians are in real danger. Whose life holds greater significance? Who do we sacrifice?” Shotgun asked gently.
Allegra held Shotgun’s eyes. “You save us.”
As Allegra walked off, I spoke my thoughts. “We’re losing her,” I stated.
Shotgun’s shoulders slumped. “Yeah.”
Shotgun
Shotgun rode the I90 alone. He needed time on the road, needed clarity to think and plan. Allegra was pulling away. Rain and he both felt it. A month had passed since their confrontation, and as February rolled on, Allegra’s withdrawal was painful.
Worse, Allegra wasn’t distancing herself for the reasons they’d always feared she would. The war and Venomous Fangswere doing a number on everyone. Allegra couldn’t understand the situation, and it was killing her.
Oh, she remained the same funny, loving, caring woman they’d both fallen in love with. However, Shotgun knew Allegra well enough to recognise the signs. Allegra was preparing to lose him. She’d started spending at least one day a week with her cousins and grandparents, in addition to the usual Sunday dinner. Those gutted him and Rain because Allegra’s entire family had welcomed them and not judged. Yet he and Rain still hadn’t been able to tell theirs. But Allegra was past waiting on him and Rain. She’d begun making plans without consulting them.
She attended their date nights, and their sex life remained on fire. Allegra continued sleeping at Rain’s house, but was no longer interested in building a home for them. When asked about her thoughts on furniture and themes, Allegra shrugged and replied, ‘Whatever made them happy.’ Shotgun wanted to shake her because his relationship was imploding. The entire thing was gutting him. The only way to fix it was unacceptable.
Leaving Hellfire MC to stand without him was unthinkable. Shotgun was needed, and while torn, he relied on his personal code to get him through. That moral compass dictated he stay.
Shotgun wanted to soothe Allegra, reassure her he’d be safe, but was unable to. That was a promise Shotgun couldn’t keep, and it killed him. Death was coming; it just depended on how hungry it was. He and Rain had accepted this a while ago, ever since Shotgun had learned that Fury from Rage MC had survived.
In all honesty, Allegra wasn’t the only one struggling. The other old ladies were too. None wished to accept that their husband might not come home. That their family could be torn apart. Shotgun knew from talk that his brothers had been doingtheir best to get their women pregnant. He regretted that they’d not met Allegra earlier so he could have done the same.
Shotgun craved seeing her belly rounded with their baby. His or Rain’s, it didn’t matter; it would still be his child. Allegra would make a fantastic mother. She’d continued travelling for work, and Shotgun was surprised at how great that had worked out. Allegra didn’t have any issues taking on jobs. While it rankled a little that she didn’t consult them, they accepted that Allegra’s life revolved around her art.
It would be easy to tell Chance, ‘I ain’t fighting, I’m pulling out.’ But Shotgun’s honour, reputation, brotherhood, and self-respect were on the line. His brothers would judge him because those who had old ladies were also in the same boat, and picking the right path. But Allegra wasn’t interested in that. The old ladies had turned on her the few times she’d met them, and Allegra was often insulted behind her back.
Slut and whore were the favourite words bandied about around Allegra. Shotgun now refused to attend the clubhouse unless it was for church, and he left straight after. A widening rift was growing between him and the club due to the old ladies and their attitude. Chance had tried talking to him, but Shotgun wasn’t willing to listen to old lady bullshit around Allegra. He also worked in his workshop and refused to man his store. He’d hired a manager for that. The old ladies couldn’t corner him with misguided bitching, and that was a relief.
Shotgun understood their viewpoint, but they didn’t have the full facts. When they did, they’d be mortified and would try to make it up to Allegra. Shotgun could stop the verbal attacks by coming clean, but his gut screamed it wasn’t the right time. Any drama now would distract Hellfire’s focus away from where it was needed. Shotgun realised he was needed at the club for planning meetings, but wouldn’t attend. As soon as he set foot in there, one of the old ladies made a beeline for him.
He heard a rumble and glanced in his mirror and saw a Harley coming up fast. It wasn’t Hellfire; naturally, he recognised his own club. The rider pulled alongside, and Shotgun offered a head tilt to Crunch, the VP of Satan’s Warriors. Crunch pumped his fist, and Shotgun nodded again. They rode together for a while before Crunch took the turning for Deadwood.
Shotgun held his fingers in the air and circled, and Crunch gave a salute. Heading for home, Shotgun stayed on the I90.
Shotgun – April 2023
“Venomous Fangs are riding,” Chance announced over the phone.
“Be there soon,” Shotgun confirmed.
He cut the call and turned to Rain.
Rain’s lips pursed.
“Time to leave,” Shotgun said, and Rain offered a curt nod. Unlike other family members, who’d been flown out, Rain would stay for a few nights at ENS Pharmaceuticals.
“You come back to me,” Rain hissed as he reached out and cupped Shotgun’s neck. Rain touched his forehead to Shotgun’s, and they stood there for a few seconds. There was no need for words.
“Do my best,” Shotgun replied.
He would. He’d do everything in his power to return to the family he was building. And after this shit, he’d be telling the club, too. Shotgun was done living life in the shadows. If standing and fighting a war that wasn’t his, and protecting innocent strangers, didn’t show what type of man Shotgun was, fuck it. Hellfire didn’t deserve him.
“Fuckin’ love you,” Shotgun ground out. He put as much feeling as he could into it. He needed Rain to understand that he was Shotgun’s future.
