That hits me straight in the heart.
“If I could do this differently, I would. But I can’t, and I have to live with that.” I sniff, pressing my fingers to the corner of my eye before anything spills over.
“Knowing I hurt you this way …” My voice falters. “And knowing I took something from her …” I swallow hard because that’s the part that sits like a stone in my chest.
“She deserved those first two years with her dad. The midnight feedings. The first steps. The first time she said a word that sounded like anything close to Daddy.” My throat tightens around it. “And I’d made a decision that erased that.”
The guilt is constant. Quiet some days. Crushing on others.
“I told myself I was protecting her,” I whisper. “Protecting us.”
I look at him then, forcing myself not to look away.
“I can live with you being angry with me,” I say softly. “I don’t know how to live with the idea that I stole time from my own child.”
The silence between us is heavy.
“Well, you’re here now.”
“Yes,” I say quietly.
“And you’re looking at me like you just expect me to what, forgive you?”
“I don’t expect anything.” I spread my arms. “I just wanted to see you. Ineededto see you. To explain.”
Our eyes lock, and all the anger, hurt … and attraction, still burns.
He stands and steps closer to me.
“Do you have any idea how hard it’s been to keep myself from seeing you?” his voice rumbles.
I suck in a breath. “Probably as hard as it’s been for me to not come down to the locker room to see you.”
We’re inches apart now.
“Liam … ” I pause. “Maybe this was a bad idea, me coming here tonight.”
“Probably.”
“You’re still mad at me.”
“Very.”
I still. “Right. Okay.”
But neither of us moves away. Instead, his hand slides to my jaw, fingers warm on my cheek.
“You drive me insane,” he says.
“But I showed up at your door to figure this out,” I counter softly.
“Yeah,” he admits, “you did.”
And then he kisses me.
This kiss isn’t soft. It’s frustrated and a bit desperate. And full of everything that still needs to be said.
My hands grip his shirt like I’m afraid he’ll disappear if I let go.