Then I see a notification from Archie Griffith, and because I have to add insult to injury, of course, I scroll up to see it.
Archie: Since I didn’t hear back from you last night, I assume you got that pussy.
I am such an idiot. Everything inside me recoils at once. The memories of my ex. The warnings from my father. The constant fear of being used. The reality is that Liam lives in another state and now may have a child with someone who sounds very much like his girlfriend.
A painful, familiar thought slices through me.I was stupid to believe, for even a second, that he could want me for me.
I look toward the bathroom door, steam drifting out from it, and every instinct inside me fractures. I should wait. I should ask. I should let him explain. But humiliation grips me tight. Fear grips me tighter.
My phone buzzes from somewhere in the room. I grab it instinctively and shove it into my pocket, only for something small and hard to clink against it.
I pull it out. The ornament. The tiny Christmas tree we bought last night after wandering through Manhattan like two idiots high on winter air and each other.
It feels unbearably heavy now.
I set the ornament beside his phone—both are symbols of two worlds I can’t be a part of. The world where he lives in another state and has other … complications, and the fantasy we created last night. None of it can be my reality.
My feet carry me to the door, even as my heart tries to root me in place. I pause with my hand on the handle, staring back at the bathroom. I almost call his name. Almost ask him what all this means. Almost choose to trust him.
But believing in people is how I got hurt last time. And I can’t—will not—go through that again. Not with someone I could fall for. Not with someone whose life, career, and complications exist so far outside my reach.
I swallow hard, open the door, and whisper, “Goodbye, Blitzen.”
Because if I say it any louder, I’ll stay.
And staying might break me.
CHAPTER
TEN
Liam
I hear a door close, and I look out into the room and don’t see her. I wipe the water off my face and clear the glass shower door to see better. “Alie?”
No response.
“What the fuck?” I turn off the water and grab a clean towel from the bar next to the shower. “Alie!” I yell out louder.
I don’t bother drying off, but I wrap the towel around my waist and run into the room.
She’s gone.
I jog over to the door and pull it open. The hallway is empty. “Goddamn it!”
How is this possible? She said she would wait for me. I know I didn’t imagine what happened last night and again this morning. I step back into the room, and the door slams behind me.
I look around the room, looking for any sign of her. Maybe she had to leave and she left me her number. But the only evidence of her being here are the rumpled bedsheets and theRockefeller Christmas tree ornament she picked out last night that sits next to my phone on the small table.
“Fuck.” I sit down in one of the chairs and lean my head back, resting it on the cushion.
Maybe I was just a fling to her after all.
CHAPTER
ELEVEN
ONE MONTH LATER
