Admittedly, things had gotten out of hand, and Quinn was more than a little tipsy and not thinking straight, so he gave August a moment to recover. He wasn’t usually this eager to verbally lash out, but seeing August again after so long had triggered his deeply buried trauma, and there wasn’t enough dirt in the world that could bury it.
August’s hand fell away from his pale face. He kept his gaze pointed downward as he continued to breathe through whatever episode he was having.
“I didn’t know she died. Esme.”
Quinn recoiled and stepped back, smacking into the door behind him. “You—how? She was married to your captain.”
“It doesn’t mean I would have seen her,” said August. “I avoided team shit whenever I could, so it’s not like I was over at their place often. It’s like that with a lot of guys, it’s not like girlfriends and wives don’t matter, but we do our separate things, you know? I must have looked at her, but I can’t remember talking to her other than the last time.”
Quinn hugged himself tighter, praying he didn’t fall apart in front of this man.
“She tried to cheer me up and then sent Callahan after me for moping. I thought she was teasing me, but Callahan hasn’t dropped it since the season started, and now I know why he was so determined.”
Quinn was shaking by the time August tore his eyes away from the tile floor and looked at him.
“Why didn’t you say anything to me? You know I’m a fucking dumbass, but I wouldn’t have treated you the way I did had I known it wasyouand not some random stalker.”
“Why didn’t Italk to you?” Quinn pushed the words through his clenched teeth, jaw aching from the pressure. “You mean how youtalked to methe night after I let you fuck me for the first time?”
There. He had said it.
There was no taking it back now.
But August was already shaking his head—already trying to deny it.
“You don’t remember?” Quinn asked, pushing against the door to make sure August couldn’t make a run for it. “We went to prom—separately because you were a straight jock, and I was the artsy emo boy. My sister let you dance with her because she’d just found out we had been hooking up for the entire school year, and she wanted to make sure we all had fun. You guys got to be prom king and queen and steal the night, and then you came back to my place, and—”
“No.”
“You laid me down on my bed, mapped every inch of my body, kissed my mouth and called me beautiful—”
“No.”
“Then you fucked me and told me that it had never been that way with anyone else. You told me I was special, and that you loved the taste of my cum, and how tight I was around your cock. And then you said you loved me—”
“No!”
The shout was loud in the empty room. August had squeezed his eyes shut, like he thought he could make Quinn disappear if he didn’t look at him—as if Quinn was a monster hiding under his bed.
“No?” Quinn’s dry laugh shook his shoulders. “What part are you saying no to?”
August blinked his eyes open, and the vulnerability that had been in his gaze moments before was gone. “I didn’t leave the table because I was upset aboutyou,if that’s why you followed me. I was feeling like a shitty teammate, and I needed a second to breathe, okay?”
Quinn smirked as he watched invisible walls of denial rapidly build between them. But he was three glasses of champagne into the night and feeling bold, so he ignored the defiant frown August was showing him, and strode across the room.
He didn’t stop until the space separating them had narrowed into a millimetre gap, one that held endless possibilities for him to play with.Quinn’s smirk grew when August held his ground, stubbornly refusing to back down even though they both knew how badly he wanted to run.
His mouth was so close to August’s that he could feel his warm breath tickling him, and Quinn tilted his head, like he was teasing the larger man with an imminent kiss.
“It’s not about me, is it?” Quinn fluttered his lashes, the gesture more of a taunt than flirtation, though his pulse betrayed him, thudding rapidly when August’s tongue darted out to wet his lips. “I believe when you say you’re upset about Esme, but I don’t believe the part you said about me.”
He knew he was being petty. Cruel, even. The words tasted bitter in his mouth, and all he wanted to do was spit them out. Whatever pain August was feeling now couldn’t compare to waking up alone after giving your heart, body and trust to someone in the most intimate way, only for them to vanish like it had meant nothing.
And August said it himself, hadn’t he? He wasn’t grieving Esme; he was upset because he had been a shitty teammate to Eren. What Quinn was doing now was a small, mean revenge. The only kind he’d ever allow himself when it came to August.
August still hadn’t spoken. He hadn’t moved beyond what was necessary to breathe. His gaze flicked between Quinn’s mouth and his eyes, and colour bloomed on his cheeks—anger, embarrassment,want.
Quinn didn’t care which. He’d made his point. He’d proven that August still felt something, even if it was only guilt or lust or both tangled together. He turned, ready to step away and reclaim the upper hand—
