It was different from the desperate kisses in his apartment. This was softer, more emotional, born from gratitude and the overwhelming feelings of the moment. And I forgot all about where we were, who might see us, what the consequences might be and I kissed him back.
“—incredible performance tonight. Rivera was absolutely dominant.”
Coach Brennan’s voice echoed down the tunnel, getting closer, and we broke apart instantly. I took a quick step back, trying to look professional, while Adan turned toward his equipment bag like he’d been organizing his gear.
“There you are,” Coach Brennan said, appearing around the corner with Kevin O’Brien. “I was looking for you both. Fantastic game, Rivera. And nice work, Coach Anders. Whatever you two have been doing in individual sessions, keep it up.”
“Thank you, Coach,” Adan managed, his voice only slightly strained.
“The improvement in his positioning has been remarkable,” I added, hoping I sounded normal. “He’s really bought into the tactical side of development.”
“It shows. I briefly spoke with McLaughlin and he seemed impressed.”
“He was very complimentary,” I confirmed. “Mentioned specific areas for continued focus.”
“Good. That’s exactly what we want to hear.” Coach Brennan clapped Adan on the shoulder. “Enjoy tonight, son. You’ve earned it. But don’t let it go to your head. You’re not there yet.”
“Yes, sir.”
After Coach Brennan and Kevin headed toward the locker room, Adan and I stood in awkward silence. The celebration, the scout meeting, the kiss all felt surreal, like we’d packed a month’s worth of significant moments into a single evening.
“That was close,” I said quietly.
“Too close.”
“If he’d been thirty seconds earlier…”
“I know.”
The reality of what had almost happened was starting to sink in. Coach Brennan discovering us kissing in the tunnel after a game, with NHL scouts in the building and media still around, would’ve been catastrophic for both our careers.
“This is getting dangerous,” I said.
“I know that too.”
“We can’t keep taking risks like this. Not when there’s so much at stake for your future.”
Adan was quiet for a long moment, and I could see him struggling with the same conflict I was feeling. The growing connection between us versus the very real consequences of being discovered.
“So what do we do?” he asked finally.
“I don’t know.”
“Because I can’t go back to you avoiding me. Not now, not when we’re this close to something real.”
I swallowed. Was that the only reason: because it affected how he played?
“Nils,” he said softly, and I looked up to meet his eyes. “I missed you. As a coach and as a friend.”
A friend. It was as good a label as anything else, I supposed. “I’m not going to avoid you. Your performance and McLaughlin’s feedback prove that we can make this work professionally.”
“And personally?”
“Personally…” I ran my hands through my hair, trying to find words for the impossible situation we’d created. “Personally, we have to be more careful. Much more careful.”
“But not absent.”
“No. Not absent.”
