I yank my face away, fighting back tears, picking up the now-broken grinder and soaked rizzlers.
“Nothing, I’m fine.” Stumbling to my feet, I catch the worry written on his face as he glances down the alley, looking for any sign of them.
“Doesn’t look fine, Screech, you're bleeding. Come on, let's get you sorted. I don’t live far from here.”
“What, you following me now?” my hand rubbing against my jaw as Chester let out a sigh.
“No, I work across the road in Bard’s. I saw them drag you into the alley as I was collecting glasses. You’re a bit hard to miss with that hair ya know.”
I looked at him as he gestured for me to follow, the blood from my nose already drying against my skin.
I hissed and flinched away from the warm rag as he dabbed it against the cut on my cheek.
“Well, if you didn’t move so much, it wouldn’t hurt.” Returning the rag to the water bowl beside him. The tears already clinging to the edges of my eyes spilt over as he twisted the water from the rag, my head lolling forward, trying to hide my sudden surge of emotion.
He placed a gentle hand against my arm, “Sorry mate, I’m not meaning to hurt you.”
Shaking my head, I wipe the wetness from my cheek with my sleeve, as my phone buzzes in my pocket. Retrieving it, I see Danny's name illuminating the screen, “Ugh, fuck off!” throwing it from my hand across the dim front room as it clatters across the wooden floor.
More tears fall as exhaustion takes over me, Chester remaining quiet at my side. I felt weak, crying over some dickheads jumping me. I've had worse happen, so why now?
“Man up, Screech,” I whisper to myself. “I should go, Matt will be looking for me.”
“I think you’ll find you're staying here. Fuck Matt, and fuck whoever put you up to this.” My brow furrowed as he stood and walked to the sink, discarding the bloodied water. “I’ll walk you home when you're ready.”
I remained still, fiddling with my hands as dread washed over me. He placed his hands upon the counter, tilting his head. “You ok?”
I hesitated, I wasn’t ok. I wanted the world to swallow me up, so I didn’t have to deal with the backlash I knew was coming.
“I don’t wanna go home,” my voice defeated in the moment. He gave a tight nod as he continued bustling around the space, then gestured to the sofa.
“You, sit. There's food in the fridge, the TV remote is there, and the blanket behind you will have to do for tonight. And most of all, ignore your phone.”
My body ached as I stood to my feet, watching the weight of his body drop onto the battered sofa, switching on the TV.
“So, what do you wanna watch? You into Doctor Who?”
By sixteen, I was on couches more than my own bed. Selling more than drugs, mostly myself, thanks to Danny and my mum. They’d say things like, “You’ll be crashing at someone’s place, maybe do them a favour.”
But those favours got twisted. And before I knew it, someone was pressing cash into my palm as if that made it okay.
Chester knew, but he never said it, not directly. Never made me feel dirty about it. But he knew. When things got too much, or too dangerous, or if Danny decided to add to my bruises, Chester was there.
Just a text:The room’s made up. Bring Squeeks.
Danny fucking hated him for it. We spent a lot of time together as the year went on. His flat was just far enough from the house to feel like another world. It always smelled of tobaccoand instant noodles. The heating barely worked, but it was safe for us. Squeeks loved it there. She’d curl up under one of his old hoodies like it was a blanket and watch trashy cartoons on his ancient TV while Chester made toast and cracked terrible dad jokes. He’d sit with her while I showered for the first time in days or slept for twelve hours straight without flinching at every sound. Sometimes he’d try to talk to me. Find out where my head was at, not pushy, just concerned.
“You’re worth more than what they’ve made you think, Screech,” nudging his shoulder against mine. “Even if you can’t see it.”
I huffed a laugh. “Don’t give me that shit, Chester. This ain't gonna change. Not all of us can escape like you did.”
“I wish you’d listen to me sometimes. Just say the word, and I’ll get you out.”
I didn’t believe him. No one was going to save us from this. Danny held too many connections in the city and would end us the second he smelt something happening.
I was too valuable to him, being passed from pillar to post between different men and women who indulged in what little self-respect I had. I was finally ‘useful’.
Chester never judged me for any of it, but I saw it on his face. The unspoken words of anger he swallowed every time I came back with more chunks of myself missing. The quiet shame that someone else’s life choices had seeped into mine.
