He didn’t answer her question, and she wished she’d never asked. ‘Do you want to get out of here? I happen to know this place that sells crepes…’
Mia laughed. ‘You can’t leave your own party.’
‘Trust me, they won’t even know I’m gone,’ he said. ‘Come with me.’
He took her hand and she followed, still not sure why she was going with him or why she’d even agreed to come tonight, or accepted his mother’s invitation. But she let herself be led, resisting the urge to pull her hand away. Something about it felt so right, but at the same time she didn’t want to give him the wrong impression, even though she’d probably been giving him mixed signals since they’d met.
‘I have a better idea than crepes,’ he said, still holding her hand as they emerged into the kitchen. ‘Have you eaten?’
Mia eyed the endless plates of food on trays that lined the kitchen counter. ‘Ah, no, but?—’
‘Sit up there,’ he said, pointing to the counter on the other side as he busied himself making two plates of food.
‘Are you sure we can?—’
‘Yes,’ he said. ‘I had all this food made, and for once I’m going to taste everything on the menu instead of watching everyone else enjoy it. Besides, I owe you for coming tonight.’
Mia felt like a teenager who’d sneaked away from a dance and was doing something illicit, not an almost thirty-year-old woman sitting in a kitchen with a handsome restaurateur. When he passed the plate to her, her mouth watered and she knew there was no way she was leaving one bite of food on the plate. She had no idea what had even happened to her, because this was nothing like her usual life, yet somehow she was going along with it as if it was.
‘How long are you in Paris, Mia?’ Joe asked as he hopped up on the counter beside her, their legs dangling dangerously close. ‘I realised I never did ask you last night.’
‘Officially only until Tuesday, but it all depends on how much I find out. I could extend my stay if I needed to.’
She ate a little of the pastry that seemed to melt in her mouth, followed by a chocolate éclair that made it almost impossible not to moan, and found Joe watching her.
‘Do I have something on my face?’ she asked, dabbing at the corners of her mouth.
He shook his head. ‘No,’ he said, softly, and she saw the way his eyes dipped to her lips before slowly lifting to her eyes again.
For a split second, she thought he was going to kiss her, but the moment passed as quickly as it had arrived. Then she felt a fool, because this wasn’t a real date, and she needed to remember that.
‘I, ah…’ His voice trailed away and he frowned, and the éclair immediately felt as if it had blocked Mia’s throat as she tried to breathe, as Joe shifted beside her. Her heart was beating so fiercely she was certain he’d be able to hear it.
But there was a voice in her head that was telling her not to let him touch her, not to let him kiss her, even if it was what she wanted. For so long she hadn’t wanted to imagine what it would be like to feel her lips or her body against another man’s, not when she’d still been yearning for Ethan. And now she wanted it but couldn’t; didn’t know how to welcome something that somehow felt so wrong.
‘Something tells me that I’m never going to forget the day you walked into my bar looking for me,’ he said, picking up an éclair of his own as his eyes linked with hers. ‘Charade or not, you’re the most unexpected thing that has happened to me for…well, for years.’
Her mouth was dry as she glanced at his lips, as she wondered whether she could go through with it if he did try to kiss her, but the door to the kitchen swung open then, interrupting whatever might have almost happened between them. The moment was over, and she didn’t know if she was relieved or sad. But there was also a part of her that knew she needed to have a first kiss sometime, and an exchange with a man she was never going to see again made far more sense than anything else.
‘Joe! We’ve been looking everywhere for you!’ It was his sister, and Joe gave her an apologetic look.
‘And yet here I was this entire time, sampling the food to make sure it was good enough.’
His sister rolled her eyes, and Joe jumped down off the counter and gave Mia his hand. She clasped it and landed softly beside him, her half-full plate discarded on the counter.
‘I’m going to head back to my hotel now, but thanks for a lovely night,’ Mia said.
Joe held her hand a little too long, before finally letting go. ‘I’ll see you for lunch on Saturday?’ he asked. ‘We can meet here, and I’ll take you.’
‘You’re sure you don’t want to stay?’ his sister asked.
Mia declined politely and thanked Joe, watching him go before slipping back into the crowd and quietly making for the door as she suddenly felt overcome with emotion. She didn’t stop walking until she’d reached her hotel, taking the two flights of stairs two at a time as tears clung to her lashes, holding them back as well as she could until she was inside her room with the door locked behind her.
And then she cried and cried, her throat hoarse and her eyes raw. Because tonight, sitting beside Joe and wishing he’d kiss her, wondering what it might be like, she’d almost forgotten the edges of Ethan’s face; had almost forgotten what it felt like when his lips pressed to her forehead as he held her, or the way his arms felt when they encircled her waist. Felt like a traitor for wanting anyone and anything that wasn’t him.
Mia wanted to remember every little thing about the man she’d loved with all her heart, but she also knew that if she didn’t start to let go, she’d be stuck forever, and that was almost as terrifying as forgetting Ethan altogether. She couldn’t stay in the past, reliving what was never going to come back, no matter how much she wished it would.
Which was why she was going to that lunch with Joe’s family whether she wanted to or not. This trip was about more than just searching for answers; it was about finding herself again and letting herself be the woman she’d once dreamed of being, and the fact that it wasn’t real meant that she didn’t need to second-guess her every action. The only thing that had saved her and given her a reason to get out of bed each day these past few years was reuniting those little boxes with the families they’d been left for. It was the reason she was so determined to uncover Hope’s story—her way of thanking her for saving her when she’d needed it most.
