‘Until you came here,’ he said, putting the two items back into the box and returning it to her.
‘Until I came here,’ she agreed. ‘I never expected to figure out the link between my grandmother and what was left for her, because as far as my family were aware she wasn’t even adopted, but when I received the letter from the lawyer here, it suddenly all started to fall into place. The clues that had seemed impossible to make head or tail of suddenly had meaning.’
‘Just so I understand correctly, it was Valentina’s choice not to make contact with you all these years? She was the one who made that decision?’
Rose could see that Benjamin had already softened towards her. His shoulders were more relaxed now, his smile easier thanit had been before. ‘That’s right. It appears that she watched my grandmother from afar her entire life, and perhaps my mother and me, too. Which makes me think that there was a reason she never tried to make contact.’
He stroked his jawline again, his brow creased as if he were trying to work it all out. ‘Valentina was a woman with all the resources a person could need at her disposal, so she must have had a very good reason not to make contact.’
‘Or perhaps, despite everything she had, an adoption was a source of shame for her?’ Rose said. ‘Trust me, I’ve turned the question over in my mind for days now, and all I can think is that she didn’t want to come forward and turn my grandmother’s life upside down by revealing such a secret. Or that perhaps she was still trying to hide what had happened in her past? It was different for women then, and she might have still held on to how she felt as a young pregnant woman.’
Benjamin nodded. ‘Perhaps you’re right,’ he said. ‘And I’m sorry for ever questioning your right to be here in the first place. We were all very protective of Valentina and of this property. Did anyone tell you that it’s been held in the one family for almost a century?’
‘Trust me, I feel the weight of that history,’ Rose said.
‘It’s hard to explain what it’s like to lose someone, especially someone who meant so much.’
She smiled, refusing to let it slip in front of Benjamin even as she felt herself cracking. ‘I understand.’More than you could possibly imagine.
‘Well, on that note, how about we go for a ride? I’d very much like to show you just how special this property is.’
Rose’s stomach did a little flip, and she was grateful for the distraction from her thoughts. ‘Let’s go now, before I change my mind about this whole riding business.’
11
Rose had never felt so uncomfortable in her life, but she couldn’t fault how patient her teacher was being. If she hadn’t been sure about him before, then she was now—he might have been gruff in the beginning, but she already admired the gentle way he treated his horses, and the kindness he was showing her.
‘Try not to clench your fingers around the reins,’ Benjamin said. ‘Take a deep breath, relax your shoulders, heels down and breathe.’
‘That’s too many things at once!’ she said, half laughing through her fear. ‘You look like you’re sitting in your favourite armchair, and I feel like I’ve just climbed onto a rollercoaster.’
Benjamin’s laugh made her laugh, which temporarily distracted her from the terror she was experiencing.
‘And now I’m going to fall off because you’re making me laugh!’
‘You’re more likely to fall off all bunched up and nervous than you are now that you’re laughing,’ he said. ‘Just trust me. I wouldn’t have put you on a horse that wasn’t safe. You just need to roll your shoulders down and relax.’
She took a deep breath and tried to keep her shoulders down like he’d instructed.
‘Look around you, Rose,’ he said. ‘I know I have an ulterior motive in wanting to make you love it here, as does everyone who loves this place, but it’s one of the most special properties I’ve ever known. Just focus on the view and try to forget about the horse beneath you. It will make riding all the more enjoyable.’
Rose did as he said and looked around, and even though she was still gripping the reins as if her life depended upon it, she found herself breathing more deeply. He was right, it was stunning, and the fields seemed to stretch farther than her eye could see.
‘How do you feel?’ he asked.
She glanced over at him, taking in his one hand on the reins, the other resting on his thigh. He was so at ease, so relaxed, that it made it hard for her not to feel at least a little relaxed, too.
‘You honestly want to know?’
‘I do.’
‘I feel as if the weight of the world is resting on my shoulders.’
Benjamin rode beside her in silence.
‘I was referring to being on horseback, but if you want to go straight to the tough talk, then sure.’
Rose groaned. Of course he’d meant the horse riding.
