“How can you—”
“Kate,” he stops me. His face is serious, and his eyes are focused, and every single doubt lingering inside of my heart fades away. I know this man. I know who he is right to his very core. The man who was so afraid to make new friends or have a relationship because he was afraid of losing them like he did Brennan. The man who has never once gone back on a favor or a promise. The man who, no matter how miserable it makes him, will go prom dress shopping because it matters to someone else.
Why am I doubting his love for me when he’s never given me a reason to?
“The only way you are going to lose me is if I get lost in the wilderness or when I die at ninety-six.”
“That’s specific.” I smile.
“Hush.” He smiles back. “I have been here, and I will always be here. And I will show you every day that I mean it.” He brings my hands up to his mouth, kissing each one tenderly. “And I know you will do the same.”
“It’s not going to be easy, loving me forever.”
“So? Easy is boring.” He smirks, pulling my hands behind his head and resting them around his neck. A beat of silence passes, and he says, “Please don’t make me beg.”
“Well, now that you mention it…” I muse, giving him a wink.
He pinches my side before sliding his hands around my waist and pulling me against him. “Please, Kate. Let me love you the way you want—the way you deserve.” It’s not begging, but the pleading in his eyes grips every piece of my heart that’s left. The pieces I gave up on. The pieces left by others. The pieces longing to be put back together.
“Okay,” I whisper, “only if I can do the same for you.”
Dazzling blue and silver beam at me as his eyes dilate slightly. “Is that a yes?” The smile on his face grows into a wide, childlike grin as I nod.
“That’s a yes.”
He kisses me without hesitation. Without fear. And without any sign of ever wanting to stop. I feel his smile as his lips are on mine, grinning wide and bright against my own. Between kisses, he says, “I will love you forever.”
And for the first time in a long time…I believe it.
Malcolm
Eight Months Later
“Don’t look at melike that.” I direct my scowl at Nugget, who is perched atop my bed, as I retie my tie for the fifth time. “I’m nervous, alright?”
She chirps at me, then proceeds to peck at the loose thread on the corner of my comforter. Elvis Presley singing “Blue Christmas” drifts through the door from down the hall, accompanied by multiple voices singing along. It’s almost distracting enough to suffocate the nerves building in my chest.
I reach for my tie again, shaking off the tremors settling into my fingers, and pull the knot loose. Half way through another tying attempt, I forget everything and pull the Santa covered silk off entirely.
Of course, today I would be freaking out.
The most important day of my life.
A knock on the door jolts my attention, and Nugget’s.
“Babe, can I come in?” Kate whispers on the other side, sending the nerves up into my throat.
She opens the door, wearing a bright red turtleneck with reindeer antlers nestled in her dark curls. Blinking ornamentearrings dangle next to her pink cheeks. Stepping into the room, she shuts the door quietly behind her, muffling the chatter and music from the living room.
“Are you alright?”
“Yes.” I crack my knuckles. “No. I can’t…” I gesture to the balled up tie thrown on the bed.
In one quick motion, Kate grabs the tie and whips it around my neck, mastering the Windsor without hesitation. “There.” Her brown eyes glisten as she smooths out the silky knot then gazes up at me.
An unsteady breath trembles out of me.“Thank you.” I take her face in my hands and stroke her cheeks, feeling them swell under my thumbs.
“It’s going to be great.” She kisses me. A soft and quick peck, like she’s done everyday for the past eight months. It’s second nature to her to be so openly affectionate with me, and my stomach still dips every time.
