“Whatever, I still have scholarships. There’s nothing to worry about.”
Ellie sits quietly, another doodle drawn. I see adollar signdoodle.
“Actually, there is. I spoke with Mr. Geer this morning and he informed me that you are at risk of failing Calculus this term.”
Devon’s eyes go big—he didn’t know it wasthatbad.
I see Ellie draw a calculator.
“Yep. So I think the best thing to do now is take a little extra time to meet with Ms. Bailey and develop a plan of action to prevent a failing grade from ending up on your transcript.” I keep my tone stern and serious.
Devon rolls his eyes. “Why do I have to keep meeting with her?”
Dude, she’s right there. “It’s for your benefit.”
“Can’t you just meet with me to keep mom off my back? And talk to Geer?”
I sigh. “You know I would, but this is how it is now. I can’t let our personal relationship interfere with your success in school, Devon.”
He rolls his eyes and looks at his watch. “Fine, whatever. I gotta go.”
“Same time next week?” Ellie stands and smiles at him.
“Yeah, okay.”
I reach out to shake his hand. He looks at it like it’s a foreign object, then shakes reluctantly before leaving.
“It feels weird to be acting so professional around him lately,” I say to Ellie. “I know how much pressure he is under, but he’s still just ‘little DJ’ in my mind. I’m having a hard time keeping Uncle Benny and Mr. B separate.” I open my office blinds.
“That can be hard—separating work from your personal life—even for me, and I’m a therapist.” She shakes her head at herself. “You can really grow to love your clients, then it becomes increasingly difficult to avoid blurring those lines. Transference can happen on both sides,” she says, putting her notebook away.
“Transference?” I question, sitting back at my desk.
“Well for me, it would be countertransference, but yeah!” The attempt to hide the confusion on my face fails as she continues, “It’s a psychological phenomenon.”
“Oo, please tell me more. I love phenomena.” I wiggle my eyebrows and place my chin on my hand.
She smirks at me. “Essentially, it is an unconscious projection of emotions from one person onto another.”
“Tell me more.” I lean and rest my arms on my desk, giving her my full attention.
“It happens when someone experiences feelings caused by one person and projects those onto someone else entirely. These feelings are usually about a person who may have made a significant impact on them—positive or negative. As a psychologist, transference may be done on me because I am the one they share these impacts and emotions with.” She relaxes as she keeps going. “The concept emerged from Freud and has been a method for identifying conflict resolutions for ages. Did you know, he believed that our development and adult personality was heavily impacted by our conflicts? Freud, I mean.” I could see she was starting to get excited about sharing this information with me.
Her face is lighting up as she talks and I am hooked. She’s nerding out and it’s adorable.
I feel genuinely interested in what she’s talking about. Even if she is using big words that make me feel a little dumb, she is trusting me enough to open up and share. And I want her to feel safe enough to share with me.
“This is probably boring. Psychoanalytics isn’t everyone’s cup of tea.” She looks around my office without meeting my eyes.
“No, please go on. You have me intrigued,” I say, looking her in the eye.
She continues, slowly relaxing and talking fast, like a child sharing their secret prized possession—bug eyed and excited, unaware of how insignificant it is to someone else because it’s the most important thing in the world to them. A smile stretches across my face as I listen to her.
She stops talking for a second and gives me a look, a different look than I’ve seen. Her eyes are softer and searching my face for something.
What is it, Eleanor?
Clearing her throat she continues, “Anyway, transference usually happens in a clinical setting. But it is possible that it can happen in everyday life. If you feel an attachment to Devon’s family, it is only natural to project all of those emotions and memories onto him involuntarily. And if you have a relationship with Naomi—”
