And somewhere in that fear, I said something that made it sound like I doubted her character.
The shower turned off, and my stomach tightened.
I stayed where I was, hands on my knees, trying to organize my thoughts into something that didn't sound defensive or hollow. As soon as the bathroom door opened, I looked up.
Vani stepped out, a towel wrapped around her. Water still clung to her skin, but her posture was straight. Composed. Her eyes met mine—bright, steady, and so deeply disappointed that it felt like a blade between my ribs.
I put that look there.
I did that.
I could only watch as she walked toward the dresser, not sparing me a glance, as if I were just another piece of furniture in the room.
"You don't need to apologize for the way I feel," she said evenly. "You also have every right to feel the way you do."
"Vani—"
"I'll move my things back into the guest room," she continued, opening a drawer and pulling out clothes with steady hands. "I think it would be better if we kept things... professional."
The words hit me like a punch to the gut. My heart pounded wildly in my chest as I tried my best to steady my breathing.
"I'll do my best to remember that this is a business arrangement," she added quietly. "Nothing more."
Business arrangement.
Nothing more.
Every sentence felt like another door closing. Another wall rising.
Panic bloomed in my chest so violently that I stood without realizing it.
"Don't change," I said, my voice rougher than I intended. "Please."
That made her pause.
She slowly turned to face me. "You want me to pretend none of this happened?"
"No," I said quickly, taking a step toward her. "God, no. I just—"
My words tangled. I wasn't used to this. I wasn't used to needing someone to understand me. I wasn't used to feeling this exposed. "I didn't mean it the way it sounded."
"I've had people stick around because of what I can give them," I continued, forcing myself not to look away. "Because of that, I learned to question everything. and everyone."
"Including me? she said quietly.
"Yes," I admitted, the word tasted bitter on my tongue. "I like you." The confession came out raw and unpolished. "More than I planned to. More than I should in a situation like this. You drive me crazy in such a good way.... It's a strange mix of emotions that's taking me time to get used to."
"I agreed to that date before I knew any of that."
"I know," I said immediately. "That's on me. Can you give me a chance to explain everything?"
Silence stretched between us.
Instead of answering me, Vani pressed her lips together and said, far too calmly, “I need privacy to get dressed.”
I stood there for a second longer than necessary, staring at her like she might open up again and give me another chance. She didn’t. So I forced my feet to move, stepping back into the hallway with a heaviness settling in my chest.
The bedroom door shut in my face, leaving me with my racing thoughts. I dragged a hand down my face. If regret had weight, it would have crushed me flat against the floors of this house.
