I open my eyes. He’s watching me. “You’re so fucking beautiful,” he whispers and I moan my response because I know it’s coming, it’s going to happen, it’s happening now. Tension builds, until the only thing I can do is throw my head back and scream.
He lifts me up and down the last few moments, grunting like an animal, finally slamming me down one last time with a roar. “Fuck!” he shouts while I collapse on his chest. A rush of heat fills me down there along with a sense of satisfaction that fills the rest of me. I don’t know where that came from, this new side of me. I only know I like her. Especially if this is how things turn out when I let her free.
For a while, it’s enough to lie here like this, with my head against his chest. The steady drumbeat of his heart gets slower the way mine does until he finally chuckles. “I don’t know what I did to deserve that, but thank you.” His hand moves over my hair, then down my back. “I would like more of that in the near future, if you don’t mind.”
“I’ll see what I can do.” It’s like everything has changed, top to bottom. Like we’ve reached some new level in our… relationship, I guess. It feels funny calling it that, but what other word would I use? Arrangement? That feels too sterile, and what’s happening between us is anything but.
He helps me off him and gets up and goes to the bathroom to fetch a washcloth for me. I am wiped out—there was a lot I needed to get out of my system, and I did, and now I’m exhausted. As usual, he cleans me gently before pulling the blankets up over me.
“Thanks,” I murmur before I smile sleepily.
He doesn’t walk away. Instead, he stares down at me with a funny look on his face. Thoughtful. “What if we got married?”
That makes me laugh. Obviously, he must be joking. Only when I look up at him, he doesn’t smile. “Maybe you forgot, but we’re already married.”
“For real, though.”
My heart shouldn’t skip a beat, but it does. Maybe a couple of beats. He can’t mean it. Why would he? I’m not sure what to say. “Why would you want to do that?”
“Maybe I’m tired of Photoshopped wedding photos on the walls. Let’s start there.” He has a way of making me laugh when he surprises me with his sense of humor. He also has a way of making me think about things I would never have considered before. Marrying him for real? By my own choice?
He lets out a long breath before shrugging a little. “Don’t worry about it. It was just a thought.”
That’s the thing. It’s not a bad thought. A confusing one, yes, and a surprise. Definitely never something I would’ve come up with on my own. But maybe, just maybe, it’s not the worst idea ever.
“Can I think about it?”
The corner of his mouth quirks upward. “That’s better than being turned down flat out. Sure. Think about it.” He is grinning to himself as he pulls on a pair of loose cotton pants from one of his dresser drawers. “I have a few things to do. I’ll try not to wake you up when I come in.”
Right, like I’m going to sleep when he comes in. He just gave me a lot to think about, the sort of stuff I never once considered before now. Not once ever in my life, and definitely not when it comes to him.
But he’s making me think. My head is swirling with thoughts when he closes the bedroom door and I roll onto my side, staring out the window and wondering what it would be like to marry him for real. How much would I gain?
And how much of myself might I lose?
32
LIAM
Aurora’s still asleep by the time I’m finished quietly, quickly dressing for the meeting. I told her I had business today, something important, but I gave her no more details than that.
I’m not lying. I’m not being dishonest. I’m only… holding back information she doesn’t necessarily need to know yet.
But really, what good would it have done if she knew I was meeting Gabriel Russo today? Would she have slept a wink? I was sleepless enough for both of us, going over every step in my head. Everything I would say to him, every argument I could offer. He won’t take this well—I won’t delude myself into thinking anything else. But I’ll make it worth his while. In the end, he’ll see.
He has to. I have to make him see. Of course, there’s a damn good chance he could decide to blow my head off and be done with it, too. A man in his position doesn’t stay that way by being balanced and reserved. It’s a chance I have to take. For her sake, for mine.
Before leaving, I take one more look, letting her fill my soul the way she always does. Lying on her stomach, her face half-buried in the pillow. Her hair is a golden fan against cream-colored silk, strands shimmering in the light filtering through the half-closed blinds. I’ll be gone when she wakes up. She expects me to be gone.
But I will come back. No matter how tense Nick looks when I join him in the garage, where he’s waiting beside the car. Like me, he’s in a dark suit, sharp as a well-honed blade. He inclines his head in a silent greeting before climbing into the SUV. I join him on the other side and the driver takes off once the door is closed.
Now that we are settled in, Nick gives me the report I was waiting for. “Crawford’s taken care of.”
The mention of his name leaves a bitter taste in the back of my throat. “Where was he hiding?”
“My guys caught up to him at the airport. He had a ticket for Switzerland.”
I grin in grim satisfaction. “Disloyal fuck.” He went MIA after Donovan was eliminated, probably knowing it was only a matter of time before I found out about his betrayal. How he knew where to locate Donovan all the time. How he gave Aurora the phone. Yet he could sit with me, swearing to do everything in his power to find the man I was searching for. And Aurora thinks she’s the only one who knows how it feels to doubt the people around her?
