‘And what’s with the accidental pregnancy thing? Like,hello? Do you not know how babies are made? Oh, and what’s with that fake-dating bollocks? I mean, how many people do you know who’ve actually had to fake-date someone in real life? Precisely zero! And of course, how could I forget about the one-bed thing? Likeseriously? Just find another hotel. Or an AirBnB for fuck’s sake. It’s not that difficult. So yeah, it’s not the sex that’s the issue, although let’s be honest, some of the positions aren’t feasible without resulting in a trip to A&E, but hey, neither is a lot of the stuff they do on porn and people still watch it, so…’ He shrugged.
My blood was boiling so much right now I was surprised it hadn’t melted my skin. I wasn’t a violent person, but I wanted to throw my coffee in Ben’s face.
I wouldn’t, of course. Not only because it was too pretty to ruin, but because my coffee was too delicious to waste on him.
And I needed to keep my job. For some misguided reason, Jess seemed to vouch for Ben, and he was her future brother-in-law, so I had to be professional.
‘Are you done?’ I crossed my arms over my chest.
‘Pretty much.’
‘I’m going to say this as calmly as I can. Ben, I think you are a monumental dick. I’m not sure if you’re deliberately trying to wind me up or if being a twat comes naturally to you, but either way, you’ll be delighted to know that you’re succeeding. I thought my ex was a tosser, but you… anyway, it will come as no surprise that I disagree with everything you said. Romanceisrealistic. And so are the tropes. Are you not aware of how your brother fell in love? Jess and Theo’s story is straight out of a romance novel. Hello? Enemies-to-lovers? That’s them. And look at Jane and Jackson? Classic childhood-friends-to-lovers, second-chance romance.’
‘Maybe, but what I said about the other tropes was true.’
‘Er, your comment about the surprise pregnancy trope was crap too. Ask anyone who’s ever had a split condom or tried and failed to use the unreliablepulling outmethod, or whose pill hasn’t worked or they just got caught up in the heat of the moment. No contraception is a hundred per cent effective.’
‘Okay, I’ll give you that. But there’s no way you can explain the fake-dating one.’
I paused. He’d got me there. The truth was Ididn’tknow a single person who’d ever needed a fake date or boyfriend, but that didn’t make reading about it any less enjoyable. I lapped that shit up.
No way that I was going to let Ben know he’d just won a point in our romance trope battle, though.
‘I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, it’s aboutescapism. It doesn’t have to be real. Monsters aren’t real. Or witches. But there’s still millions of books and films about them and no one bats an eyelid. And does it even matter? As long as people are reading books and enjoying them, isn’t that what’s important?’
I couldn’t believe that not only did I have to work with this fool, I also had to choose books for him and convert him to reading romance.
I hated everything about my old life. The thought of going back to my old town and job made me want to break out in a cold sweat. But being forced to work with Ben was making me reconsider my decision to move here.
Honestly, the way he was pushing my buttons, I wasn’t sure how long I could keep my cool without losing my shit.
I’d do my best to get through this brainstorm session, but straight afterwards I’d speak to Jess. Therehadto be another way.
I’d happily prepare a hundred-page presentation and a book’s worth of ideas for the retreat and bar if I could be leftto do it on my own. I didn’t need annoying Benjamin Buttface’s input.
I hoped Jess would trust my judgement enough to agree.
But if she didn’t, I had no idea what the hell I was going to do.
6
BEN
‘So how was your first day of working with Sarah?’ Theo asked as we walked along the beach towards his house.
This wasn’t LA, but I had to admit that Sunshine Bay was still pretty special. I hadn’t even known beaches like this existed in this part of England until I’d first come to visit Theo.
‘It was… interesting,’ I replied.
‘Care to elaborate?’ Theo pressed.
‘You know I love a challenge, bro, but even I have to admit that working with her is difficult. We have different views. I’m never going to change the way I feel about certain things and so putting me with someone who is borderline evangelical about it just isn’t going to work.’
‘You’re talking about love, right?’
‘No! I’m talking about romance books.’ My chest tightened.
‘Romance booksareabout love.’
