Her smile dissolved into a hard, thin line. Now that she was in Michael’s bed, lying beside him, the painful realisation that she could never be normal, could never have whatever was between her and Michael came crashing down around her.
Lorelai felt the sudden urge to leave, to flee, to put as much distance between her and Michael as she could. Being close to him felt so comfortable and so right and yet so terrifying. Being close to someone in the way she felt she wanted to be with Michael would mean being honest. It would mean not having secrets. Secrets so big they could destroy a relationship. She panicked. She couldn’t find enough strength to stay calm. All she could think about was getting as far away from Michael as possible. She kicked off the covers, grabbed her clothes and ran out of his room. Lorelai could hear him calling out after her, but she kept running.
Whatever they were couldn’t happen. She’d let herself get too close. She’d let things go too far. She’d let herself develop feelings for someone. And how could she be close to someone when she might be the reason they died?
No. It could never happen. Not now. Not ever.
Nine
It was half nine in the morning, and Lorelai was making her way to the tube station with Joanie, Grayson and Aden. Lorelai loved Soho best in the morning. The way that Soho began to rumble into life as the morning trundled on, and the vibrant colour of the party the night before drained away and turned into the slate grey of business suits, as they hurriedly weaved in and out of tourists. At 6 a.m., you could still spot the last vestiges of the previous evening. A couple of hobbits walking through Soho at that time would barely turn one head. But at half past nine, things were different.
‘You are both far braver than I am.’ Lorelai laughed, wafting Grayson’s green cape behind him.
‘It takes a very secure person to dress like that and walk with as much purpose as you do,’ Joanie called over.
Grayson held his chin high and began to strut down the street. Aden gave his brother a shove.
‘Oh, come on, you’re not still angry at me, are you? You looked so cute when you were asleep, I couldn’t possibly have woken you up!’ Grayson went to pinch his cheeks but Aden shoved him away again.
‘I missed half of the second movie! I slept through so much good stuff.’
‘Pfft, you’ve seen them all before and you woke up again long before they got to Mordor. There’s always next time!’ Grayson laughed but Aden pointedly pulled his earbuds out of his pocket, stuffed them in his ears and walked on ahead.
‘So, Graaaaayson.’ Joanie sing-songed the words and Lorelai shot her a sideways glance, knowing this meant she was up to mischief. ‘Are you free sometime soon? Saaayyyy tomorrow?’ She looped her arm under Lorelai’s.
‘Maaaayybbee,’ Grayson sang back. ‘Why?’
‘Lorelai has Mondays off, so I was wondering if you fancied taking her for dinner?’
‘Joanie!’ Lorelai groaned, trying to pull her arm out of Joanie’s iron grip.
‘Shh, the grown-ups are talking,’ she said, patting Lorelai’s hand.
Grayson darted a look at Lorelai, who rolled her eyes in her friend’s direction. Clearly these plans were out of her control and so he took her shrug as the go-ahead to continue using Joanie as the middle woman.
‘I can’t do dinner as I work in the evenings on Monday.’ Grayson smiled. ‘I could do brunch, though?’
‘Brunch?!’ Joanie shrieked, startling a few nearby pigeons. Even Aden pulled out one earbud and glanced back in their direction.
Grayson laughed. ‘What’s wrong with brunch?’
‘Brunch. As in the meal between breakfast and lunch?’ Joanie asked. ‘Brunch… as in the meal that consists of a measly amountof avocado smashed to a pulp, shoved on wafer-thin gluten-free bread served with a coffee that comes in a cup the size of my little toe? All for the extortionate price of our monthly rent?’
‘I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who’s felt so strongly about a meal before.’ Grayson rubbed his eyes, his brain groggy from a night of very little sleep and not quite up to the task of tackling Joanie’s ferocity.
‘Don’t even get her started on elevenses…’ Lorelai muttered, and she enjoyed the sleepy smile he threw her way.
‘You’ll need to do better than brunch.’ Joanie wagged a finger at Grayson.
‘I like brunch!’ Lorelai protested.
Joanie disentangled her arm and playfully shoved Lorelai away. ‘You’re made for each other! Alright, then. Grayson, just call up the cinema and ask for me because this one has no follow-through and we can organise a time and a place. I’m gonna go and bother Aden and give you guys some… alone time.’ With that she skipped off, and pulled a bud out of Aden’s ear and placed it in one of her own.
‘Wow. Is she—’
‘Always like that? Yeah.’
They both slowed their pace to create more distance between them and Joanie and Aden.
