“How old is she now? Twenty-two? Twenty-three?”
“Twenty-two. She won’t be twenty-three until November. She graduates in May with a degree in accounting. I mean, she’s an adult. But she also loves her parents. She doesn’t want this to be the kind of thing where she has to choose between them and me. And I get it. I’d hate to lose the relationship with my parents.”
“So, you’re going to have to win him over.”
“I don’t know how to do that, Coach.”
“It won’t be easy.” He shakes his head. “But it can be done.”
“I’m all ears if you have advice.”
“Obviously, you need to be respectful. Get them good seats to some games, especially the playoffs. Play by their rules for now. Do lots of little things for Victoria that make her life easier, if you can, so they can see you not only can take care of her but that you want to.”
“Okay.” I nod.
“Anything else?” He almost seems amused as he asks the question.
“She’s coming on the road trip to New York, and I didn’t want you to see her and feel like I’ve been hiding something. Well, I guess I have, but I wanted to be sure before I came to you.”
“I appreciate that. Don’t worry about me. I want you to be happy. I do need you to be extra careful with her dad. We don’t need that bullshit during the playoffs.”
“Absolutely not. I’m giving her a little space to deal with it and figure out how or if she’s willing to push back.”
“And if she’s not?”
That would be a disaster, but I’m not going to admit that out loud.
“I don’t know. She’s asked me to be patient while she works on things at home, so that’s what I’m doing.”
“There’s nothing wrong with going slow.”
“We’ve already lost four years.”
“You had four years to grow up,” he corrects me. “To figure out who you are and what you want in life. It appears that you still want each other, which is great. So, give her time. Parental guilt is bullshit, in my opinion, but they’re her parents. I get it. And by giving her time, maybe her father will see the man you are.”
“The trouble is, I hardly see her. She goes to school and works full-time. I’ve got hockey and practice and everything that goes with it. Now that he won’t let her sleep over and we have a freakin’ curfew, I don’t know how to have an adult relationship when we’re being treated like we’re still teenagers.”
He seems thoughtful. “Yeah, that’s definitely problematic. I think what it’s going to boil down to is her setting some boundaries. Yes, she’s living at home, but she’s an adult about to graduate college. And let’s be clear—he can threaten to kick her out, but how is that really a thing? She has you. He has to know you can take care of her.”
“I don’t think her father believes I really love her. He seems to have this idea that she’s nothing but an easy lay or something. Totally ridiculous since, you know, it’s not that hard for me to get laid.”
“He’s a girl dad. I understand the fear but you still have to let your children live their lives. I have a daughter and she hasn’t started dating yet, but when the time comes, I’m going to be strict but fair. I’ll have to meet the boy, I may want to meet his parents. There will be a curfew. I don’t know at what age I’ll let a boy drive her somewhere yet. But my belief as a parent is that you have to give them the ability to grow and learn. I’ll trust her unless and until she gives me a reason not to. At twenty-two, I’d like to think I won’t be all up in her business.”
“That sounds incredibly fair. Unfortunately, that’s not the situation with her dad.”
“Look, here’s my advice for what it’s worth. Make sure any woman you settle down with prioritizes your relationship. Yes, family is important. I’ll never say otherwise. But if you marry her while her father continues to hate you, you’re setting yourself up for a lifetime of misery. Especially if she’s determined to stay close to them. Think long and hard, Jordan. I’m sure she’s lovely and I have no doubt she loves you. The only question is whether or not she loves you enough to make a big sacrifice. Unless her father is a complete douche, he’s going to come around.
“Imagine when there are grandchildren in the picture—I think he’s being a hard ass now because he can but once she puts her foot down, he’ll back pedal. From what I remember, he’s a bit of a bully and bullies usually back down when someone stands up to them.”
That’s a point I didn’t consider until now.
“Thanks, Coach. I appreciate you. More than you know.” I stand up and reach for the door.
“Oh, I know.” He chuckles. “And Jordan?”
“Yeah?” I pause, glancing back over my shoulder.
“I’m happy for you.”
