“Why?”
His eyes open and he narrows them. “Why? Really?”
“Do you hate me, Jordan?”
“Do you hate me?”
“I thought I did. Until you saved me at the club.”
“And now?”
“Now I’m just…confused. Sad. Thinking about all the what ifs. What if our baby had lived. What if my dad wasn’t such a jerk. What if…we were still together.” I swallow, feeling incredibly vulnerable. I don’t know what I’ll do if he says something obnoxious.
“We’d be married now,” he says without hesitation. “Maybe divorced, but we would have gotten married initially. Been a family for our baby. I would have tried to make you happy. I don’t know that I was mature enough back then, but I loved you enough to try.”
“I think we’d still be married. Probably have another kid or two.”
For some reason, that makes him smile. “You’re probably right.”
“Do you ever think about him or her?”
“Not really. Not until that night when I dropped you off and I saw your nephew. He looks like what I imagine one of our kids would look like, so it hit me hard.”
“I grieved for a long time,” I admit. “I lost my baby and the man I loved in one fell swoop. I barely graduated. Didn’t go to prom or any other senior year activities. Mostly, I stayed home and cried myself to sleep every night. My parents didn’t have any sympathy at all, and of course, then Ivy got pregnant and it was all about her drama.”
“I’m sorry you were alone,” he says. “I was alone too. My teammates said it served me right for being stupid. My parents said this was a life lesson or something to that effect. And then I got sent down to the minors, so I was pissed off at the world.”
“We both suffered alone,” I say gently. “I wish we’d had each other to lean on.”
“I wish that too.”
“It’s been four years, Jordan. Do you think it’s possible to…start over?”
“Start over?” He blinks, as if he wasn’t expecting that.
“Yeah. You know, spend a little time together. See if there’s still a spark.”
“Baby, you know damn well there’s still a spark. If there wasn’t, we wouldn’t be here.” His gaze is practically burning into mine.
There is absolutely still a spark. It’s so evident the whole restaurant could probably see it if they look close enough.
It’s just a matter of whether or not we want to act on it.
I know I do.
“So…what do we do?” I ask finally.
“I leave on a road trip tomorrow,” he says slowly. “But I’ll be back Sunday and if the flight isn’t delayed, I’d like to take you to dinner.”
“Okay,” I whisper softly. “Yes.”
Chapter 9
Jordan
It’s a short road trip, playing Tampa and Carolina, and we win both games.
Now that there’s a plan to see Victoria again, I can focus on hockey. For the most part, anyway. I still think about her a lot more than I probably should, and we text. A lot. We’re both busy, so sometimes there are hours between each text, but other times we sit up talking late into the night.
