“One last night,” I whisper.
His lips crash against mine, his body arching into me, pressing me back against the door of his truck. A whimper slips from my mouth as his fingers tangle through my long blonde waves, giving a soft tug that makes my breath hitch. Everything about him consumes me. The world around us blurs, the empty car lot fading to nothing, the streetlamp above dimming to a haze. His breath mingles with mine, desperate and uneven, and I gasp for air as our tongues fight for control.
“Get in,” he rasps, reaching behind me to yank open the door before spinning me around.
I climb in, losing my footing, but before I can fall, his hands are there, wrapping around my waist and lifting me easily. Heat pools low in my stomach. I cross my legs, then uncross them, trying to dull the ache burning through me.
Cool air whips my hair around as we drive. Hunter’s hand flexes on the steering wheel, the vein in his forearm pulsing as he turns down the dirt road, his other hand gripping my knee, his heated touch sending chills up my spine. When he pulls off to the side, the empty field we’ve come to call ours stretches out under the moonlight. The starsshimmer above, and the playlist he made just for our drives hums softly through the speakers. We sit in silence, the tension between us thick enough to choke on.
“You know,” he says finally, “I wish I could give you everything you deserve. Right here, right now.”
“I know,” I say.
“Halle’s here now. Maybe once we have things back on track and my mind isn’t so riddled with guilt… we could try.”
“I don’t want to try.” I turn to face him. “I want it all with you. I want to wake up in your bed and not have to lie about why I stayed if the guys are there. I want to come home with you at the end of the night. I want to kiss you in front of everyone. I want to love you so hard, no other woman would dare to look at you.”
His eyes burn with something wild, desperate. “Fuck,” he exhales. “I want that too.”
I unbuckle my seatbelt and climb into his lap. My hands cup his cheeks as I lean in, my lips barely brushing his.
“All you can give me right now is this,” I whisper. “The secret drives. The late nights in your bed. The hidden touches when no one’s watching. I have to watch girls at work flirt with you. I have to tell men I’m single.”
The words taste like fire on my tongue. I need him like I need air.
“I’m sorry,” he murmurs, forehead pressing to mine. “I’m so fucking sorry. One day, I’ll give you all of it. One day, I’m going to beg for you to give me that chance to show the world you’re mine.”
“But that one day isn’t today, is it?”
His eyes close, his head falling back against the seat. I drag my nails through his hair, the sound of his hitchingbreath sending a shiver down my spine. He’s fighting himself, wishing he could be that man now.
“It’s okay,” I say, my lips brushing his. “Then make it a night I won’t ever forget.”
His fingers move to the button of my shorts, and I nip at his bottom lip as the night swallows us whole.
1
I MISS HER
HUNTER
I can’t do this. I can’t find her. I can’t confront him.
Can’t.
Can’t.
Can’t.
“You can’t… or you don’t want to?” her voice whispers to my left, and something inside my chest tightens.
Groaning, I sit up, my feet sinking into the soft carpet.
The memory fades behind my eyelids, but my heart pounds in my chest. I lean forward, elbows on my knees, and rake my hands through my hair, tugging at the straight ends.
Fuck.
I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. I took too long, I left, stayed gone without a word, too lost in my own demons. But I did what I had to do. My heart feels lighter, more accepting of where I came from… yet heavier with the weight of where I want to go.
