Her smile returned, and quickly grew to a beam. “I think I foundanotheranswer. I was so distracted last night, I forgot to tell you: My brothers supported the decision for a change. Today we rearranged my training sessions. I finally feel like things are coming together. I just pray I have time to learn what I need to—”
“Hold, what happened? What change did they support?”
“I’m being shifted—in the squad, my normal squad—to subterfuge. Instead of ambush and scouting in one, and subterfuge in the other, they’ll move me to strategy and stealth, which means my training will have a lot more crossover, and I won’t have to do so many different sessions—”
“What?!”I growled.
Bren went very still. Hands still on my arms, she froze, staring up at me. “You’re angry?” she asked in a small voice that Ihated.“I thought you’d be pleased. I can take some of Terra’s instructions and—”
“Did you say subterfuge? For yoursquad?”
“Yes.”
“Bren, have you thought this through at all?”
She frowned.“Yes.Why do men always ask me that? These duties are exactly what I’ll be doing on this mission, so I don’t see—”
“Subterfuge is spying, Bren!”
“I know. That’s what I’m already doing—”
“With me. On this mission, you’ll be providing avery specificrole, without deep cover, and connected to me, where I can watch you.”
Her head jerked back. “I’ll still be acting independently. You said that yourself—”
“Yes, but with the protection of others knowing you and I arealigned.Bren, do you know what the subterfuge training consists of? It’s highly dangerous andoften solo.When wereturn from this mission, if you’re fulfilling that role in the squad, you could be sent out again. Without me. They’ll separate us!”
Her eyes clouded and I felt her pang in the bond at the thought that reflected mine. “But, that’s always been the risk. We knew that from the beginning. You told me if we went to war—”
“It’sfarmore likely if you’re trained in subterfuge. Even outside war time.”
Her eyes narrowed and she dropped her voice. “I don’t want to be apart from you any more than you want to from me. But Donavyn, do you think I can’t do this without you?”
“No!” I sputtered.
“You think I’m not good enough? Not capable enough? They’ll train me more when we return. They won’t just throw me out there—”
“The king will throwanyoneout there if he believes it benefits the kingdom,” I growled. “The fact that you’re being given this mission at all, proves that. But next time I may not be there to help you, Bren. If you’ve proven yourself in the field, and this is your specialty—”
“But that’s not a reason to resist training. I’m here for a reason. I have a purpose. Even the dragons areclearon that. I have to make my mark—I have to achieve. And if we’re ever going to stop hiding, the Furyknights have to see that I’m valuable, with or without you!”
“And they will—butthisisn’t necessary to prove that.”
“You’d rather they kept me trapped in this training that forces me to fight men and attempt ambushes on soldiers twice my size?”
“That’s not what I said,” I growled. “Please, Bren. Return to scouting—at least then I can have your squad assigned to support my work—”
“Donavyn,no!They just agreed to this because I asked for it. And I’mthrilled.I know I can do this. I’ve been floundering ever since I was inducted.I finally feel like I have my feet under me. You got me that meeting with the queen, I’m talking to Terra, and taking this training to help me and Akhane stay safe—”
“You’re the furthest thing from safe if you’re infiltrating our enemies on your own!”
“And you said you believed in me! That you knew I could do it!”
“I do! That’s precisely what I’m afraid of!”
“What?! That makes no sense.”
I clawed a hand through my hair. How to distill twenty years of military experience, training, and war into a single conversation? How to give her an appreciation for the picture of what she was about to face?
