I was stunned. These men hadaskedfor women to join them? “Maybe… maybe more women will be Chosen now? Since I gained the pin?”
Voski shrugged. “I know Akhane heard your heart, and you were right for her. But she’s the first that we know of. Are there others in other kingdoms? Maybe. Everyone in leadership wonders. It’s not something we considered before. All we know for sure is that you’re meant to be here, and you’ll do something none of us can do.”
“Like what?”
Voski looked away. When he spoke, it was hesitantly, as if he chose his words carefully.
“This training will be different, Bren. We’re not testing to see if you’re capable—you wouldn’t be here if you weren’t. This is testing to see where you are of the most use—and where you’re weakest. We’ll be finding out where you fit, and how you can supplement the team. I won’t pretend it’s easy. All of us struggled during this part, because it’sdesignedto find our weaknesses. It’s humbling. But that’s okay. You need to know: You’resupposedto fail. You’re supposed to learn where you’re weak, so we know where to assign you to your strengths. Buteven knowing that, it will be hard when it happens. So, if you need to talk to someone, talk to me. Or Gil. We’ve been through it. Just be careful with your words. We can’t risk revealing ourselves. We have to be ready to workalone. It’s part of the job. When there’s time, Gil and I will show you the place we go when we need to be certain we’re alone.”
“Why would you need to be alone if this is already isolating?”
Voski’s eyes darted away from me then and his face got tight. “Sometimes you just need to… decompress.”
I nodded. I understood that. It was part of why I’d been grateful for my little stable room for all those months of training. I was surprised to hear my brothers felt that way too. They all seemed so confident and strong.
“Look, I’m telling you a lot because the Commander warned me we don’t have a lot of time. War is coming. We think your training will be short. This is a lot for your first day. But it’s the only choice we have. Tomorrow you return to duties, and we’ll need to figure out where there’s a four-hour window to meet and train that won’t interfere with your patrols.
“Between Gil and I—and probably a little bit from Ronen—we’ve got to shove as much of what we know into your head as we can in the next few weeks. I won’t know what it is unless I share the mission, but the word is that you’ve already been named by the king, Bren. They already have a job for you.”
My stomach twisted in knots at that, but I nodded. Donavyn had said as much, though he’d given me no clue what I’d be doing.
But then I frowned. “How do I learn a new job in a few weeks?”
Voski sighed and sat back in his chair. “This is where trust comes in—for both of us,” he said grimly. “I have to trustmyleaders that they’re assessing you correctly, and not setting youup for failure. And I need you to trustmethat I wouldn’t throw you into a trap.”
I looked at him, still not used to seeing him so invested. Of my brothers, only Einar was more aloof. I’d always liked Voski, but also been a little afraid of him. His sharp demeanor cracked the day I’d been forced to tell them why and how Akhane chose me. And that had given me a hint that there was a lot more to him than the sarcastic comments, and malicious delight in needling Harle. But I hadn’t seenthis.
“You’re really a leader,” I said dumbly.
Voski shrugged.
“No, I mean it,” I said. “The way you’re talking now, you sound like Ronen. And Don—I mean, the General.You’reone of the good guys.”
He huffed. “That’s debatable.”
“No, seriously. That’s why you talked to me after I told you guys about Akhane and my… despair. Right?”
His expression grew more serious. He nodded. “I wanted you to know you weren’t alone in that feeling. That’s all.”
I nodded. “You wereChosenfor this for a reason too.”
To my surprise his eyes dropped to the table between us and his expression darkened. “I suppose so.”
I smiled. “Then I’m honored.”
Voski frowned, but his eyes were amused. “Honored bywhat?”
“That I get to see behind the curtain.”
Voski rolled his eyes. “Dear God, don’t let Gil hear you say that. There’s no curtain, I assure you. I’m myself with our squad. Just more restrained.”
“Hiding your soft center?” I asked, only half-teasing. “If we go on mission together, am I going to find out you sleep with a stuffed, toy dragon?”
He shook his head, but his smile got a little wider. “I knew you’d be trouble.”
I would have laughed it off—he was clearly teasing—but there was a part of me that still wondered. “Did you get to choose?” I said carefully.
Voski frowned. “Choose what?”
